Viva Zapata!

Hollywood's never known how to handle the Mexican Revolution (1910-1921), vacillating between romanticized epics like Viva Villa! (1934) and cynical adventures of The Wild Bunch variety. Elia Kazan's Viva Zapata! (1952) desperately wants to make a serious statement on revolutionary politics. Despite stylish direction and a solid cast, it makes a muddle of its message.  

Emiliano Zapata (Marlon Brando) leads. He allies with President Madero (Harold Gordon), but becomes an outlaw again when General Huerta (Frank Silvera) overthrows Madero. Zapata fights Huerta's government, along with internal dissidents: his brother Eufemio (Anthony Quinn) and shifty subordinate (Joseph Wiseman) have their own ideas on waging revolution. Zapata joins with Pancho Villa (Alan Reed) to capture Mexico City, but immediately recuses himself of power. Villa's successor Carranza enlists Aguirre in a devious plot to bring Zapata to heel.

Working off a screenplay by John Steinbeck (!), Viva Zapata! intends. Beyond genre-mandated thrills and scenery, Kazan tries to mix political drama and character study. The story unfolds in clipped yet sentimental prose that seems more Hemingway than Steinbeck. Zapata's solidness contrasts well with Mexico's round robin of hapless leaders: offered the Presidency by Pancho Villa, he immediately refuses. A Mexican Cincinnatus, Zapata remains pure by returning to his hacienda. 

But Kazan's message feels compromised. Much of Zapata has an agreeable roughness, highlighting themes of class conflict and cyclical revolution. Zapata's followers have grants dating back to Spanish rule, which doesn't remotely faze Diaz: legality's followed only when convenient. Certainly Madero's adherence to legal strictures allows Huerta to checkmate him. And the violence is shockingly blunt, culminating in a gun-down double cross presaging Bonnie & Clyde. Yet Zapata's politics seem curiously formless and desultory, beyond wanting to save peasants from evil landowners. That's something both Che Guevara and the Three Stooges have no trouble getting behind. 

For the most part, Zapata makes a disappointingly conventional hero. There's some edginess in his subversive rhetoric and sexual charisma, but he's a generically apolitical rebel doing the right thing. His conflict between middle class comfort and rural background, and his testy wooing of wife Josefa (Jean Peters) prove less compelling. He's even less successful as a symbol. Kazan assures us that Zapata's less important than his followers, but this undercuts the Great Man grandstanding. We're reminded of The Magnificent Seven assuring us that "only the farmers have won."

Viva Zapata! scores thanks to Kazan's assured direction. Stylish yet less showy than other "great directors," Kazan matches Steinbeck's terse prose with almost elliptical stylization. Joseph McDonald employs deep focus photography not only in darkened interiors but expansive battle scenes, with Christ imagery and revolutionary tableaux resembling Eisenstein. There are impressive set pieces when Zapata "summons" peasants to rescue him, and Madero meets a pathetic fate. There's also facile elements, like Zapata's white horse that lives on as an obnoxious symbol. It's artistic yet (mostly) subdued, a solid combination.

Zapata! inspired a whole sub-genre of Westerns, projecting contemporary concerns onto Revolutionary Mexico. Indeed, they're informally known as Zapata Westerns (more flattering than Jenni Calder's "Chili con carnage" label). This genre reached its apex in the '60s, where The Professionals and The Wild Bunch largely channeled Vietnam-era cynicism into violent mayhem. In contrast, Spaghetti Westerns wholeheartedly embraced politics: A Bullet for the General turns Kazan's ambivalent cynicism into crude Marxist agitprop, while Sergio Leone's Duck You Sucker! swipes several key images, including Huerta watching Madero's execution through a rainy windshield.

Marlon Brando does surprisingly well as a hardened idealist. Brando brings his usual method tricks to the part, but it's less obviously affected than many of his turns. Anthony Quinn won an Oscar playing Eufemio, boisterous and larger-than-life in agreeable fashion. Joseph Wiseman does more subtle work, conveying villainy through a chilling sneer. Jean Peters is less successful changing from haughty bourgeois to devoted peasant wife. Zapata's rivals are represented in a gallery of impressive character turns: condescending Fay Roope, meek Harold Gordon, ruthless Frank Silvera and boorish Alan Reed.

Viva Zapata! presents some interesting ideas indifferently. As an exploration of revolutionary politics, it might have done better to flesh out Zapata's beliefs beyond do-gooderism.

Is this the best Don Camillo passage ever?

                

Mayor Peppone has just been to confession, after 30 something years.

He confesses to Don Camillo that he was the one who gave the priest a good beating a few weeks previously.

Being the good priest that he is, Don Camillo gives Peppone a penance of 20 Hail Marys and 20 Our Fathers.

And then, as Peppone kneels to say his penance, Don Camillo discusses the matter with the crucified Christ above the altar:

"Lord, if I have been a worthy servant to you, grant me one small favour.

Let me at least hit him with this candle. After all, Lord, what is a candle?"

"No", replied Christ, "Your hands were made for blessing."

Don Camillo sighed wearily. He genuflected and left the altar.

As he turned to make a final sign of the cross, he found himself behind Peppone who still knelt at the communion rails and appeared absorbed in prayer.

"Lord", groaned Don Camillo, clasping his hands and looking up at the crucifix, "My hands were made for blessing, but not my feet".

"There's something in that" replied Christ, "but, I warn you, just one".

The kick landed like a thunderbolt. Peppone didn't bat an eye.

After a minute he got up and sighed.

"I've been expecting that for the past ten minutes," he remarked casually, "I feel better now."

"So do I" exclaimed Don Camillo whose heart was now as light and serene as a May morning.

Christ said nothing at all but it was easy to see that He too was pleased.



If you have not read any of the Don Camillo stories, I urge you to do so. They were written by Giovanni Guareschi and are still to be found on Abe and Amazon.

Garden and Other Statues in Lewes Fleamarket

Is this the statue that will grace my allotment?

I went to Lewes yesterday and popped into a local fleamarket where I discovered a nice range of garden statues and other religious statues. I am looking for a nice statue for the allotment and found a nice St Therese of Lisieux. I guess she will be wanting some kind of roses archway or something at the back of the allotment. There were other statues as well, which are quite reasonably priced. He had more than one St Therese of Lisieux and a couple of statues of Our Lady.

It was so sad to see this statue of St Anthony of Padua without a head for Our Blessed Lord. Is there anything we can do to save this statue and repair it? It has been there since the last time I went into the fleamarket and it really angers and saddens me that the Lord has no Head! I think you will agree with me that something must be done!

Aaaaagggggh!!! Moving swiftly on. More statues here, some nice, some not so nice.

As you can see, there are two nice statues of St Joseph with the Child Jesus, a gigantic magi for a Nativity scene and a huge statue of Our Lady Immaculate. I must confess that I wonder what Our Lady would look like if she were painted. Pretty good, I reckon. The picture is a bit blurry, but she is perfect but for some damage to her fingers. Yet here she is languishing in a fleamarket in Lewes.  Maybe a parish needs a statue of Our Lady out there. I know there are restorers out there who can help to make statues as good as new. Something must be done!

Litany of Syrian Saints

May God be praised for the result of yesterday's vote in Parliament. I consider what happened in Parliament yesterday to be nothing short of miraculous. I am sure that while the US and, going by this piece, Israel are unhappy about this vote, which reflects the distaste British people now have for 'humanitarian intervention' on the basis of deeply suspect evidence, the House of Commons will also be thanked by Syrian Christians, by whom Assad is supported, in the face of Islamic fanaticism, persecution, violence and extremism. 

Quite how Israel benefits from the Muslim Brotherhood toppling Assad's regime is beyond me, but then I'm no expert on politics in the region or the strategic end-games in the middle east. The next time Israel wants the US and the UK to fight wars on its behalf, they should just be honest and say so.

Let us pray for the Christians of Syria and for peace in the middle east and 'pray ye, for the things that are for the peace of Jerusalem'. Eyes now turn to the US, Obama and Congress. May the Saints of Syria intercede for the region...May their prayers assist the Nobel peace prize winner to avert WWIII.

Litany of Syrian Saints

For private use only

Kyrie eleison, Kyrie eleison.

Christe eleison, Christe eleison.

Kyrie eleison, Kyrie eleison.

Christe audi nos, Christe audi nos.

Christe exaudi nos, Christe exaudi nos.

God, the Father of Heaven, have mercy on us.

God the Son, Redeemer of the world,

God the Holy Ghost,

Holy Trinity, one God,

Holy Mary, pray for us.

Holy Mother of God,

Holy Virgin of Virgins,

St Michael,

St Gabriel,

St Raphael,

All ye Holy Angels and Archangels,

St John the Baptist,

St Joseph,

All ye Holy Patriarchs and Prophets, pray for us.

Blessed Peter the Apostle, and first Patriarch of Antioch, pray for us.

Blessed Paul the Apostle, born in Tarsus,

Blessed Paul the Apostle, blinded and converted on the way to Damascus,

Blessed Paul the Apostle, enlightened and baptised at the Street called Straight,

Blessed Apostles Peter and Paul, models of humility and justice at Antioch,

Blessed Luke the Evangelist,

St Ananias of Damscus, laying thy holy hands on Blessed Paul the Apostle,

St Manahen, disciple of the Lord and foster-brother to Herod Antipas,

All ye holy Syrian disciples of the Lord,

All ye holy Syrian innocents,

St Apollinaris, pray for us.

St Felix of Nola,

St Abraham of Arbela,

St Dorotheus of Tyre,

St Eusebius of Samosata,

St Anthony of Antioch,

Fr Francois Mourad,[1]

All ye holy Syrian Hieromartyrs,

Ss Victor and Corona, pray for us.

Ss Galation and Episteme,

Ss Cosmas & Damian,

St Romanus of Samosata,

And thy Holy Companions Ss Jacob, Philotheus, Hyperechius, Abibus, Julianus and Paregorius,

St Anastasius of Antioch, and thy Holy Companions Ss Julian, Celsus and Marcionilla,

Ss Romanus of Caesarea and Barulas,

St Andrew Stratelates and thy 2953 Holy Companions,

St Julian of Cilicia,

All ye Forty Soldier Martyrs of Sebaste,

St Eusiginius,

Ss Sergius and Bacchus,

All ye holy Syrian martyrs,

St Ephrem the Syrian, pray for us.

St John Chrysostom,

St John Damascene,

All ye holy Syrian teachers of the Faith,

St Evodius, pray for us.

St Ignatius of Antioch,

St Herodian of Antioch,

St Theophilus of Antioch,

St Serapion of Antioch,

St Asclepiades of Antioch,

St Babylas of Antioch,

St Eustathius the Great of Antioch,

St Anastasius II of Antioch,

All ye holy Patriarchs and Bishops of Antioch,

Pope St Anicetus, pray for us.

Pope St Sergius I,

Pope St Gregory III,

St Cyril of Jerusalem, pray for us.

St Sophronius of Jerusalem,

All ye holy Syrian Bishops and Patriarchs of Jerusalem,

St Maron, pray for us.

St John Maron, first patriarch of the Maronite Church,

St Mar Awtel,

St Domnina of Syria, Virgin and disciple of St Maron,

Blessed Abdel Moati, Francis and Raphael Massabki, and thy Holy Companions,

St Birillus, ordained by the Blessed Apostle Peter, pray for us.

Ss Philo and Agathopodes,

St Jacob of Nisibis,

St Frumentius, Apostle to Ethiopia,

St Maruthas, Father of the Syrian Church,

St Romanos the Melodist,

St Cosmas the Melodist, and foster-brother to the Damascene,

St Palladius the Desert Dweller, pray for us.

St Thalassius of Syria,

St Alexius of Rome, the Man of God,

St Simeon Stylites,

St Baradates,

St Auxentius of Bithynia,

St Simeon Stylites the Younger,

All ye holy Syrian Priests and Levites,

All ye holy Syrian Monks and Hermits,

St Philip of Agira, pray for us.

All ye holy Syrian Confessors,

St Serapia, pray for us.

St Margaret of Antioch,

Ss Domnina, Berenice and Prosdoce,

St Basilissa,

All ye holy Syrian Virgins and Widows,

All ye holy Syrian Saints of God, intercede for us.

Be merciful, spare us, O Lord.

Be merciful, graciously hear us, O Lord.

From all evil, deliver us, O Lord.

From all sin,

From thy wrath,

From sudden and unlooked for death,

From the snares of the devil,

From anger, and hatred, and every evil will,

From the spirit of fornication,

From plague, famine and war,

From revolution,

From all false prophets,

From the errors of Mohammed,

From jihad,

From infidelity, heresy, paganism and heathendom,

From everlasting death,

Through the mystery of thy holy Incarnation, deliver us, O Lord.

Through thy Coming,

Through thy Birth,

Through thy Baptism and holy Fasting,

Through thy Cross and Passion,

Through thy Death and Burial,

Through thy holy Resurrection,

Through thine admirable Ascension,

Through the coming of the Holy Ghost, the Paraclete,

Through thy apparition on the Road to Damascus,

Through thy rebuke and blinding there of proud Saul, enemy of thy Church, and persecutor of Christians,

Through thy conversion and enlightening there of this foe, and his elevation to the blessed and most glorious office of Apostle to the Gentiles,

Through his preaching of thy Holy Gospel,

Through his witness to thy Name amongst the Heathen,

Through his faithfulness to thee, even unto death,

Through the blood of thy Holy and Blessed Syrian martyrs,

In the day of judgment,

We sinners: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst spare us: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst pardon us: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst bring us to true penance: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst vouchsafe to govern and preserve thy holy Church: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst vouchsafe to preserve our Apostolic Prelate, and all orders of the Church in holy religion: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst vouchsafe to humble the enemies of holy Church: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst vouchsafe to give peace and true concord to Christian kings, princes, and rulers: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst vouchsafe to grant peace and unity to the whole Christian world: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst call back to the unity of the Church all who have strayed from her fold, and to guide all unbelievers into the light of the Gospel: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst vouchsafe to give discernment and wisdom to the rulers of nations: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst vouchsafe to confirm and preserve us in thy holy service: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst lift up our minds to heavenly desires: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst render eternal blessings to all our benefactors: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst deliver our souls, and the souls of our brethren, relations, and benefactors, from eternal damnation: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst vouchsafe to comfort the afflicted people of thy Holy Syria, we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst vouchsafe to give and preserve the fruits of the earth: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst vouchsafe to grant eternal rest to all the faithful departed: we beseech thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst vouchsafe graciously to hear us: we beseech thee, hear us.

Son of God: we beseech thee, hear us.

Agnus Dei, qui tollis peccata mundi, parce nobis, Domine.

Agnus Dei, qui tollis peccata mundi, exaudi nos Domine.

Agnus Dei, qui tollis peccata mundi, miserere nobis.

Christe audi nos, Christe audi nos.

Christe exaudi nos, Christe exaudi nos.

Kyrie eleison, Kyrie eleison.

Christe eleison, Christe eleison.

Kyrie eleison, Kyrie eleison.

Pater noster [in silence, until:]

Et ne nos inducas in tentationem, sed libera nos a malo.

Domine exaudi orationem meam, et clamor meus ad te veniat.

Oremus:

For world leaders:

O God, who taught the hearts of the faithful by the light of the Holy Spirit, grant that, by the gift of the same Spirit, we may be always truly wise, and ever rejoice in his consolation. Through Christ our Lord. amen.

Against Persecutors of the Church:

O Lord, we beseech thee, crush the pride of our enemies and humble their insolence by the might of thy hand. Through our Lord Jesus Christ… amen.

In any tribulation:

O Almighty God, despise not thy people who cry out in their affliction: but for the glory of thy Name, be appeased and help those in trouble. Through our Lord Jesus Christ… amen.

For our enemies:

O God, who art the Lover and Guardian both of peace and charity, give to all our enemies peace and true charity, and grant the remission of all their sins, and by thy might deliver us from their snares. Through our Lord Jesus Christ… amen.

For the defence of the Church:

Almighty, everlasting God, in whose hand are the strength of man and the nation’s sceptre, see what help we Christians need: that the heathen peoples who trust in their savagery may be crushed by the power of thy right hand. Through our Lord Jesus Christ… amen.

In time of war:

O God, who bringest wars to nought and shieldest by thy power all who hope in thee, overthrowing those that assail them; help thy servants who implore thy mercy; so that the fierce might of their enemies may be brought low, and we may never cease to praise and thank thee. Through our Lord… amen.

For peace:

O God, from whom are holy desires, right counsels and just works; give to thy servants that which the world cannot give; that both, our hearts may be disposed to obey thy commandments, and also, the fear of enemies being removed, our times, by thy protection, may be peaceful. Through our Lord Jesus Christ… amen.

Domine exaudi orationem meam, et clamor meus ad te veniat.

Exaudiat nos omnipotens et misericors Dominus. Amen.

Et fidelium animae per misericordiam Dei, requiescant in pace. Amen.

---

[1] Not canonized, shot by Islamists 2013.

Mills and Boon goes Latin

"Samantha had been looking forward to Sunday all week.

As the parish choreographer she had led her small group of 'maidens' in creating a special dance in honour of the patron saint of the parish, St Knobbly, and they had been practising their twerk routine for what seemed like ages.

Arriving at the church Samantha felt her heart miss a beat.

Something was wrong, very wrong.
Someone had reversed the altar so that Fr Reg would have his back to the people. Samantha let out a gasp; there was smoke coming from the sacristy, could the church be about to be engulfed in flames?

And then, he appeared and Samantha instinctively knew that she would be safe in this man's hands.

He moved from the hips up and Sam felt a sudden surge of blood to her face as she blushed uncontrollably.

Who was this tall stranger with grey flecked eyes and lean jawed features?

 And why was he wearing a cassock and cotta?

"Hi" he said casually. "Are you looking for somebody?"

"I think I have found him" said Samantha, looking at him from lowered eyes and feeling very pleased that she had put on that new foundation make-up delivered by Pickfords, the day before.

"I'm the thurifer" continued the broad shouldered server, "sorry if the smoke alarmed you".

"Not at all" cooed Samantha. "I like a man who smokes but I thought that Lucifer was supposed to be bad?"

He threw back his head and laughed showing a set of even, white teeth.

"That's very good" he said. "But excuse me while I arrange the sanctuary for the Missa Cantata"

"Th-th-the Missa whatta?" stuttered Samantha, her mind racing as she thought that she knew all of the latino dances but this one did not ring a bell (or, did it?).

"We are having a Solemn High Mass" this morning, said the server. "With three priests, Fr Blogfinegan, Fr Sexton and Fr Harry from 'oop north'".

Samantha felt as if a cold hand was clutching at her heart. "B-but where are you from" she managed to gasp out.

"Me?" said the server, "I'm LMS".

"What?" "Does that mean Lean, Manly and Strong?" asked Samantha hopefully.

"No, you little fool. It stands for Latin Mass Society.
Today is the day that the Latin Mass returns to St Knobbly's, on his great feast".

"You brute!" exclaimed Samantha as she ripped the thin, flimsy lace from his broad, manly chest.
"Does this mean no dancing on the sanctuary and no more Special Holy Aunties of the Eucharist?"

'Fraid so" said the server, your twerking days are over, there's a whole world out there just waiting to be rediscovered. Why don't we step into the future together, who knows, you might even come to love Latin".

"That's true" thought Samantha as she snuggled into the coarse black cloth of his cassock.

"Maybe the Latin Mass does have something to offer that is bigger than both of us".

With apologies to Mills and Boon.




 

'Just War'? No, Its Just War Another War...

What would happen if Catholics or Muslims tried this on in London?

...like all the rest.

I really do wonder sometimes. Let's just imagine for a while that a some Muslims, or even some Catholics, got together and got loads of guns, ammo and bombs from a nation friendly to the idea of an uprising against HM Government, that gave us such nuggests as 'gay marriage' and abortion - the killing of citizens in the womb by the State.

Let's just imagine that either the Muslims or the Catholics in the UK thought democracy had had its day and wanted either a full-scale theocracy and Sharia law (in the case of Muslims) or a Catholic monarch in the case of Catholics. Imagine that either of these two parties were funded and backed by either some Islamic country abroad or by, I don't know, Poland, or something, in the case of Catholics.

A whole gang of people have been sent loads of weapons and ammunition, rockets, guns, you name it. Do we really imagine, in such a scenario that a leader considered illegitimate in the eyes of these two communities would be asked to join David Cameron for friendly talks around the table? Or would, instead, the full force of the State be brought to bear in order to impose order and the rule of law on the civillian population, the armed combatants imprisoned, probably slain?

I don't think, in such a scenario, in an attempt to topple 'democracy' in order to replace it with something more 'reliable' and 'stable', like monarchic rule or theocracy, the Catholic or Muslim militants would be given much time or show much mercy. I don't think it would be long before, should a 'civil war' break out, the armed forces would be slaying the militants left, right and centre, by any means at their disposal.

From what I've seen, I'm not convinced Assad is responsible for the chemical attacks anyway. Exactly how long would a rebellion against what more or less constitutes a masonic government in the United Kingdom be tolerated? How long would the rebels last? My guess is not long. Perhaps, in such a scenario, some foreign nation would intervene to launch a humanitarian war. Perhaps, but would it really be in their economic, political or natural interest. My guess is only if there were some serious natural resources at stake.

The seriously disturbing thing is that the UK and the US are arming more or less the same people they were 'hunting down' in the wake of 9/11, from Afghanistan to Iraq and beyond. Obama is doing what George W Bush did only while holding his hand up in a 'peace sign'. I find it rather incredible that the nobel peace prize winner could end up leading us into WWIII, but there we go. I guess that's kind of what antichrist's do.

The war against Syria is not a 'just war'. It's just another war.

Solemn Profession at the Norbertines of Br Stephen

There are some wonderful images, at the LMS Chairman's blog, of the Solemn Profession of Br Stephen Morrison at the Norbertine Community of Chelmsford.

I met Br Stephen when I visited the community of Premonstratensians a while back. Pray for him and pray for the very wonderful Norbertine order at St Philip's Priory.

He very kindly invited me to go to his Solemn Profession and I'm afraid I don't have any excuses that won't sound absolutely pathetic, so I'm sorry for not making it, Stephen, and may God reward you for your generosity to Him and bless you in your vocation. May it be glorious and fruitful.

Many congratulations to him. I so wish I was there! Here is a photo of Br Stephen with Br Pius Collins in Lazio that I robbed from Br Stephen's Facebook page.

Many congratulations to Br Stephen on profession of his Solemn vows of poverty, chastity and obedience. If, like me, you don't really understand the world of solemn vows, simple vows, monastic formation, what it all means and the rest, there is a rather good explanation here.

The underground cathedral - carved from salt

I know that Poland is the territory of my good friend Chris at the excellent
Left-Footer blog so I beg his forgiveness for my trespasses.

And a H/T to Clare, my niece, for sending me the information.

There is nothing particularly spectacular, you might think, about a salt mine.

Parts of Cheshire, I believe have been mined extensively for centuries.

But Wieliczka Salt Mine, near Krakow, in Poland hides a secret, an underground treasure, hidden from human eyes, but not from the sight of God.

Some 327 metres below the surface, miners, over the centuries, have worked to laboriously carve out of the rock salt a Cathedral.

Not only a Cathedral but also three chapels and literally dozens of holy statues.

Now, you may conjure up an image of a rough hewn cavern and fairly fundamental altars, communion rails and so on, but that is not the case.

Feast your eyes on this extraordinary work of man, dedicated out of love of Almighty God.

Of course, somehow a Welsh dragon managed to put in
an appearance

The mine has been in existence since the 12th century but ceased operating in 1996.

Now the Wielicza has been placed on the UNESCO list of World Heritage Sites

St Kinga - patron saint of miners

Please note: The mine is open to visitors and access to the depths is via a lift (or elevator if you come from N. America).

Source: Wikimedia

Mills and Boon goes Catholic!

Yes, in an unexpected move, romantic novel publishers, Mills and Boon has announced that they have commissioned a group of their authors to write specifically on Catholic  subjects.

"It's part of our programme of reaching out to niche markets" explained Crispin de Warren Manley, Head of Marketing.

And here, as a total worldwide scoop we have an extract from the first novel, 'Not a marrying man'......you read it here first, remember:-

"Marjorie stepped out of the shower and admired her long, slim legs in the mirror.
It was Sunday and she had not attended Mass in months and so, she had decided to put on some of her best finery and go; after all, the unmarried Deacon Antonio was going to be in attendance and she had long harboured feelings of pent up passion for him, in spite of his acne problem and built up heels.

Quickly slipping into her flimsy top and flaired mini skirt she grabbed her handbag and made for the door, it wouldn't do to be late for Mass today.

She drove into the church car park and could not help noticing a tall, menacing figure in black at the foot of the church steps.

"Who could that be?" she wondered. "It's not one of our dear greeters"

Nimbly slipping out of the car she gaily approached the church entrance whereupon she was grasped firmly by one shoulder.

"Where do you think you are going dressed like that?" a voice hissed in her ear.

It was none other than Deacon Antonio.

"Antonio" exclaimed Marjorie. "Why are you handling me so roughly, you brute?"

Secretly Marjorie rather liked Antonio's firm, masculine approach, she had thought him somewhat limp wristed up until now.

"I've told you before" said the Deacon. "Don't call me Antonio, it's Reverend Mr Deacon if you don't mind"

"But Reverend Mr Deacon" gasped Marjorie throatily. "You have never spoken to me like that before"

"Things have changed" said Antonio, slightly relaxing his grip on her smooth, white shoulder, "We've got a new PP and he's a you know whatter"

"A you know whatter?" Marjories lisped. "Whatever do you mean Ant....Reverend Mr Deacon?".

"He's a Latinist" Antonio snarled. "And what is more he is celebrating a Latin Mass this morning. We are sunk".

"B-b-but" Marjorie stammered, "What does this mean?"

"It means" Said Antonio with heavy irony. "That you have to dress modestly for Mass and wear a mantilla"

Marjorie swooned and fell heavily against the deacon who propped her up on his broad, masculine chest.

"But where will I get some modest dresses from?" sobbed Marjorie, nestling into the rough, heavy tweed jacket of the man she secretly loved.

"You can borrow one of mine" said Antonio.

"You do know that I am gay don't you?"

To be continued.......


Apologies to M & B

Who Supplied ACTA with a Safe Haven?

At a press conference the President of Evangelisation and Catechesis tells journalists he denies supplying a venue as a 'hide-out'...

The Catholic world reacted with shock this week when it was revealed by a leaked memo on a parish newsletter that 'A Call to Action' (ACTA), the terrorist organisation which online intelligence agencies suspect to be linked to overseas dissident organisation 'Call to Action' (CTA), are alleged to having been supplied with sanctuary by President of Evangelisation and Catechesis, Bishop Kieran Conry. It is also believed that the ACTA splinter group have used weapons of Mass-destruction on their own people in the past and are intent on doing so again.

CDF Inspectors Assess Source of Lethal Toxic Gas, Condemn WMDs

CDF inspectors are already based in Caterham, in the Diocese of Arundel and Brighton, trying to assess whether ACTA have used weapons of Mass-destruction on their own people, but because the rebels are spread out over a large area of England, forming their own cells in different regions, inspectors maintain it is difficult to assess at the current time whether they have been used on the Faithful.

It is alleged that among conventional WMDs used on civilians, such as guitars, Communion in the hand, 'extraordinary' ministers of Holy Communion, altar girls and felt banners, a lethal toxic spirit has been used on the Faithful, emanating from the mouths of pastors of the Church, that puts its victims at ease and leaves them doubting in the existence of sin, Heaven, Hell and the need for Confession and to reform their lives.

Satellite images of rebel hideout in Caterham

Intelligence Points to Caterham as Base for Rebel Hideout

Intelligence agencies have gathered credible evidence that Caterham, Surrey, is to be a focal point for the group of rebellious and dissident militants who seek to overthrow the teaching authority of the Church, known as the Magisterium, as new attempts to undermine the Church's authority are endorsed by the violently sectarian terrorist organisation that many have described as 'fundamentally Protestant'.

A full-scale land invasion by forces loyal to Rome is considered unlikely at this stage, but it appears possible that the Surrey region will be hit by a aerial bombardment of miraculous medals, scapulars and penny catechisms in an effort to bring the dissidents to the table for talks. If these efforts fail, Rome may resort to more severe means in order to contain the rebel faction known as ACTA, though such talks is said to be 'sabre-rattling'.

Intelligence gathered: CDF working on plans to stop rebels in Caterham

'Schismatic Spring'?

It is unknown yet whether Rome General, Pope Francis, is aware of the gathering in Caterham and what, if anything, he will do about it, since rebels, including those who support and arm them within the Church perceive a general relaxation in discipline and doctrinal teaching in the papacy.

It is feared by forces loyal to Rome that while Pope Francis himself is orthodox in Catholic belief, the atmosphere of his papacy is being perceived by dissidents, rebels and liturgical terrorists as giving the green light to what has been dubbed a 'schismatic Spring' that is taking place across the Church around the West in particular. 

CDF Inspector: Can he bring ACTA rebels to the table?

With His Holiness's emphasis on 'dialogue, dialogue, dialogue', the rebel forces see such quotes as an endorsement of dialoguing endlessly about their campaigns for women's ordination, an end to priestly celibacy, a 'new way of thinking' about marriage, divorce and remarriage and a new vision of the Church that does away with such matters as sin and Salvation.

Questions remain for President of Evangelisation and Catechesis

While CDF inspectors ascertain the truth as to whether President of Evangelisation and Catehesis, Bishop Kieran Conry, has given his personal approval to the ACTA terrorist cell meeting, forces loyal to Rome are disturbed that a Prince of the Church should be perceived to be permitting the rebel splinter group - alleged to have WMDs in their possession and to have used them in the past - sanctuary and refuge in a Surrey-based parish.

Rome is by now aware of the encouragement the ACTA rebels gain in their cause when permitted to find sanctuary in any Diocese of the Catholic Church in England and Wales and will be concerned that they have found a foothold in Arundel and Brighton. More updates as they come in...

Still time to email your MP

The House of Commons will debate tomorrow whether or not to shove a few massive warheads in the direction of President Assad's military bases.

Trouble is, a few civilians will get killed in the process but, hey, that happens in a war.

Except that, this is not a war as such.
It is a civil conflict and, much as we are appalled at the sight of civilians gasping in extremis as a result of chemical warfare, we do not know with any degree of certainty, who launched them.

The argument that only Assad has the rocket bases is specious, we know that a great many types of rocket may be launched from the back of massive trucks and it could just as easily be a cynical move by Al Qaeda elements, killing their own people in order to provoke western intervention.

I am not a pacifist. I do believe in the Aquinan principles.

None of those are met in the case of Syria and Hague's outrage at the fact that these weapons are being used is laughable when you think who it was who dropped the bombs on Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

So please Google your MP and send him/her a pithy email asking him/her to vote for restraint  tomorrow.

And please spread the 'Syria prayer'

Please say this prayer for Syria

And please spread the Syria prayer on your blog or Facebook or anywhere where it will be read....

    Prayer for peace in Syria

God of Compassion,

Hear the cries of the people of Syria,

Bring healing to those suffering from the violence,

Bring comfort to those mourning the dead,

Strengthen Syria’s neighbours in their care and welcome for refugees,

Convert the hearts of those who have taken up arms,

And protect those committed to peace.

God of Hope,

Inspire leaders to choose peace over violence and to seek reconciliation with enemies,

Inspire the Church around the world with compassion for the people of Syria,

And give us hope for a future of peace built on justice for all.

We ask this through Jesus Christ,

Prince of Peace and Light of the World,

Amen.

Petition: For the people of Syria, that God may strengthen the resolve of leaders to end the fighting and choose a future of peace.

We pray to the Lord…

Talking of Syria, Mr Cameron....

....please remember, war is not like this!

 

God of Compassion,
Hear the cries of the people of Syria,
Bring healing to those suffering from the violence,
Bring comfort to those mourning the dead,
Strengthen Syria’s neighbours in their care and welcome for refugees,
Convert the hearts of those who have taken up arms,
And protect those committed to peace.

 

God of Hope,
Inspire leaders to choose peace over violence and to seek reconciliation with enemies,
Inspire the Church around the world with compassion for the people of Syria,
And give us hope for a future of peace built on justice for all.

 

We ask this through Jesus Christ,
Prince of Peace and Light of the World,
Amen.

Petition: For the people of Syria, that God may strengthen the resolve of leaders to end the fighting and choose a future of peace.
We pray to the Lord

 

 

Has Change Shattered Our Faith?

The Catholic Church asked itself this question in 1976. The answers it gave were optimistic. Is it time to ask the same question in 2013, when only 75% of those remaining Catholics who didn't walk away in the radical 70s believe  the Real Presence of Our Lord in the Blessed Sacrament today?

Read more at The Guild of Blessed Titus Brandsma for a book review of a pamphlet created in the immediate aftermath of the changes that swept through the Church in the wake of the Second Vatican Council. There's an interesting review by another Guild member of some of Mgr Benson's books on the same site. That's right - I'm plugging the Guild. If you are a Catholic blogger faithful to the teaching of the Church, do think of joining.

If it looks Protestant and sounds Protestant......

.....then, logic dictates, it must be Protestant.

I mean, of course, the Ordinary Form of Mass, the Novus Ordo.

This post has been prompted by several comments, made privately, from recent converts who have found themselves in the 'double somersault' position, namely, the first somersault in converting to the Catholic Faith and the second in discovering the Tridentine Latin Mass.

And then comes the process of attempting to reconcile the one with the other - a hard and often painful period of doubt and concern.

And to a certain degree it applies also to Novus Ordo Catholics who, again, 'discover' the Old Rite and then come up against the same problems as their converted brethren.

Now, I stress that, what follows are my own views and I accept that some may be offended by them but, I return to the post heading: "If it looks Protestant and sounds Protestant, then it must be Protestant".

The liturgical case of OF vs EF has been made many times but I would like to focus on the physical, actual signs of Protestantisation in the new Mass.

The elements that make the distinction between old and new as clear as white is from black.

Catholic or Protestant? Hard to tell in today's world

TEN SIGNS OF PROTESTANTISM IN THE NOVUS ORDO:

Again, I pre-qualify what follows by stating that we have many good priests who celebrate both forms. I believe that to be an acceptable but dangerous thing inasmuch that, in many respects, the two represent very different spiritual processes. 
We also have many indifferent priests who only celebrate the Ordinary Form, and that, indeed, is an extremely dangerous thing.

1. The Catholic altar has been replaced by the Protestant table

2. The Faithful stand to receive the Body and Blood of Christ in the hand

3. Holy Communion is given in both forms

4. Unifying Latin has disappeared to be replaced with the vernacular

5. The Priestly vestments have morphed into the style of the Protestant pastors

6. Females as altar servers

7. Religious statues, flowers on the altar, candle offerings - all are disappearing in the new order

8. Holy water fonts are, often dry and neglected

9. Sacred music has been replaced by guitars and tambourines

10. Altar servers wear albs

Now, please comment by all means but do not tell me that, in your parish, the water font is full to overflowing.
My points are generalisations and you will always find parishes where the Novus Ordo is celebrated reverently and largely in Latin.

But, every time that I attend an OF Mass (infrequently, admittedly) I see all that is listed above taking place.

That list, of course, is not exclusive. You could add the disappearance of bells, thuribles, dancing and so on to the list (and please feel free to do so in the comment box).

So, on the one hand we have the Mass that organically expanded until, in the 16th century, it was (broadly) ratified and has remained the same ever since, throughout the world, and, on the other, the Mass that was committee designed in the 1960s and 70s, that is subject to constant variations and changes according to the whim of the celebrant and that is allegedly in the vernacular but, in Britain today, is just as likely to be in Tagalog or Polish or Mandarin.

I know which Mass has Catholic Doctrine in its DNA.

I know which Mass I will attend to fulfil my Sunday obligation.


Picture: Infallible Catholic blog

Our Lady of Czestochowa

It is the Feast of Our Lady of Czestochowa today.

It is also a bank holiday.

See...Our Lady hasn't given up on England after all.

Now, please can we have all our other Holy Days as holidays as well?

The Wild Geese

The Wild Geese (1978) might be Andrew V. McLaglen's best film. It's his usual melange of cliches, slumming actors and un-artful direction, all packaged in a geriatric Dirty Dozen clone. But the end result makes explosive entertainment.

After a military coup in an unnamed African country, banker Sir Edward Matherson (Stewart Granger) hires a crack mercenary team to overthrow the government and rescue President Limbani (Winston Ntshona). Colonel Faulkner (Richard Burton) is the no-nonsense leader; Rafer Janders (Richard Harris) an embittered idealist; Shawn Fynn (Roger Moore), an ace pilot; and Pieter Coetzee (Hardy Kruger), a racist South African. Their team succeeds brilliantly, only to be double-crossed when Matherson makes a deal with the new government. Now Faulkner's band must evade swarming government troops, keep Limbani safe, and just possibly get revenge.

The Wild Geese closely resembles The Professionals, with its aging mercenaries on an impossible mission, only to be double-crossed by their employer. The central raid even parallels its equivalent in the Richard Brooks film. McLaglen hits few original notes, preferring a schematic commando story with predictable twists, obstacles and portrayals. Despite its cynicism, it's the polar opposite of more serious flicks like The Dogs of War. That film makes it mercenaries out as maladjusted burnouts; The Wild Geese announces it's fun to kill people.

Geese's first half dwells on stage-setting and characterization. It's a shame that screenwriter Reginald Rose paints heroes in the broadest strokes. Faulkner is the weary cynic interested only in money; Flynn has no qualms killing people, but draws the line at drug-running. Janders gets a particularly cloying arc: he dotes on his adorable son, but must abandon him for one last job! Coetzee, meanwhile, conveniently discovers tolerance while palling around with Limbani. It's a credit to the actors that these scenes work at all.

The movie takes flight in its skillful action scenes. After the requisite throat-clearing, McLaglen keeps things moving fairly briskly. Second unit director John Glen handles the battles with aplomb, particularly an air raid at midpoint and the running machine gun fights in the jungle. The body count's high, even by genre standards; it's no sure thing our heroes will come out alive. On a technical level Geese is reasonably accomplished; only Joan Armatrading's cheesy title tune grates.

Richard Burton provides typical I'm-here-for-the-paycheck slumming; rarely has an actor seemed so bored. Richard Harris and Hardy Kruger fare better despite treacly character arcs; Harris makes his final scenes almost poignant. Roger Moore has little to do after an excellent intro, force-feeding heroin to a gangster. None of them give great performances, but they generate enough star power to hold our interest.

McLaglen assembles a neat supporting cast. Stewart Granger (Young Bess) briefly appears as the Geese's employer; Barry Foster (Frenzy) plays his go-between with Faulkner's crew. Jack Watson (Peeping Tom) steals his scenes as a hard-assed Sergeant Major; Kenneth Griffith (A Night to Remember) plays the effeminate yet tough medic. Winston Ntshona gives an excellent turn, making a potentially silly part credible. Even bit parts go to familiar faces: Jeff Corey, Percy Herbert, Patrick Allen, John Kani, Frank Finlay.

Flaws aside, The Wild Geese is a fun adventure film. Like most movies of its type, it makes perfect viewing on a lazy Sunday afternoon. It's got big stars and big action scenes - what more do you want?

Did Your Parish Priest Mention 'the H words' Today?

The parish priest at the morning Mass I attended mentioned Hell, Heaven, Damnation and Salvation. I really fail to see how any parish priest could sing or proclaim the Gospel today without mentioning the 'H' words - Heaven and Hell in his homily.

It's kind of obvious what Our Blessed Lord is talking about. You wonder how a priest manages to wriggle out of this one. The parish priest at the evening Mass at the other Church I attended somehow managed to get through the homily without mentioning the 'H' words but then again even the Holy Father managed it today.

'He went on his way through towns and villages, teaching, and journeying toward Jerusalem. And some one said to him, "Lord, will those who are saved be few?" And he said to them, "Strive to enter by the narrow door; for many, I tell you, will seek to enter and will not be able. When once the householder has risen up and shut the door, you will begin to stand outside and to knock at the door, saying, `Lord, open to us.' He will answer you, `I do not know where you come from.' Then you will begin to say, `We ate and drank in your presence, and you taught in our streets.' But he will say, `I tell you, I do not know where you come from; depart from me, all you workers of iniquity!' There you will weep and gnash your teeth, when you see Abraham and Isaac and Jacob and all the prophets in the kingdom of God and you yourselves thrust out. And men will come from east and west, and from north and south, and sit at table in the kingdom of God. And behold, some are last who will be first, and some are first who will be last."'

The Lord granted to St John Bosco a vision of what it means to die in a state of mortal sin and it ain't pretty. God, be merciful to me a sinner and save me in your love! Save our souls from everlasting death! We Catholics need to hear about Heaven and Hell. These are our two possible final destinations for eternity and in order for us to be saved, we need to be told what we need to be saved from. If we persist in our sins to the end we will be damned. If we persevere in a State of Grace we can hope for salvation. Pray that the clergy will not fear telling their flock about Heaven and Hell, sin and salvation. May they and our Bishops be brave in proclaiming the truths of the Gospel.

At last - a Bishop speaks out!

Even the logo features the symbol of The Holy Trinity

It may not be the Same Sex "Marriage" issue or a statement in opposition to homosexuals adopting babies but, it's a start and a good one at that.

The Girl Guides Association recently announced moves to remove any reference to God in the oath (or promise?) made by Girl Guide Novices before they are received into the arms of Baden-Powellship.

Christian groups worldwide have been aghast at the prospect and now a Bishop, and an English Bishop at that, has fearlessly stepped up to the mark to fly the flag for Christendom (rather too many metaphors, I'm afraid).

Thank heavens for a Bishop who is not afraid of his own shadow...trouble is, the Bishop concerned is an Anglican and not a Catholic - no surprise there then.
Bishop Michael Nazir-Ali has commended those Girl Guide leaders who are refusing to implement the new humanist oath and is encouraging others to do likewise.

But, it's not altogether a whole hearted stand against secularism as Bishop Nazir-Ali is advocating having a choice of oaths, one Christian and one Secular.

A shame really, there are over 900,00 Girl Guides who have already taken the Christian oath without any problem.

This is just another cynical and silly move by the humanist lobby.

The Catholic problem vis a vis the Bishops is that they all have a 'diocesan' mentality and no one speaks out with a corporate voice, as England and Wales is the territory of Archbishop Vincent Nichols.

And we know, do we not? That His Grace lacks the Heenan principle of grabbing a television camera crew and putting the Catholic view forward pronto.

World Powers Shaping Up for Something Big?

Yikes. Syria is a potential flashpoint with Russia and William Hague is banging the drum. Is it an oil drum or some other kind of drum? We don't yet know, but 'humanitarian principles' is one motive I doubt.

Iraq, Afghanistan, Syria, Egypt...then Iran?...the West is driving ahead with a foreign policy that is taking in, by hook or by crook, middle eastern states.

Exactly for how long is Russia going to put up with the line of middle eastern states being overthrown, undermined and eventually invaded? Until the West gets to the border of Russia? Okay, I admit my geography is bad but you get the gist.

Meanwhile, are the world powers gearing up for something big? Really big? The last time they did, we had this in the United Kingdom.

National Service? Oh boy. Our Lady of Fatima, pray for us.

Can we survive the growth of Islam?

No.

Not according to this clip on Muslim demographics....."in a very few years, Europe, as we know it, will cease to exist".

 

L'Avventura

Michaelangelo Antonioni is certainly among the most challenging Italian filmmakers. Non-fans disparage works like Red Desert (1964) as stereotypical art movies where "nothing happens." Later entries Blow-Up (1966) and Zabriskie Point (1970) go the opposite route, imbibing in obnoxious symbolism that infuriates more than engages.

Quite a bit "happens" in L'Avventura (1960) - just not what a casual filmgoer expects. It starts as an inscrutable mystery then becomes a slow-burning melodrama. Its depth of character and impenetrable atmosphere make enjoyable, if somewhat frustrating viewing.

Five friends go on a boat trip to the Aeolian Islands. Headstrong Anna (Leah Massini) has a rough-and-tumble relationship with Sandro (Gabriele Ferzetti), a smooth playboy. Among others joining them is Anna's friend Claudia (Monica Vitti). During the trip Anna mysteriously vanishes; a search by her friends, and later the police turns up nothing. Claudia and Sandro struggle to move on, falling for each other in the process.

On one level, L'Avventura works as masterful bait-and-switch. Early scenes presage Picnic at Hanging Rock, a vacation capped off by an eerie disappearance. Antonioni doesn't go for Peter Weir's quasi-supernatural atmosphere, instead drinking in the beauty of the Aeolians. The mystery centers on half-remembered hints, like a phantom rowboat Claudia thinks she saw. Unlike Hanging Rock, where the mystery obsesses everyone, L'Avventura treats it as one of those things. People die or disappear, but life goes on.

Halfway through, L'Avventura shifts to a character study. Antonioni shows Claudia and Sandro as well-off dilettantes, unable to enjoy their status. Their affair seems perfunctory, a facade of human interaction disguising their mutual discontent. Still, unlike spoiled Anna (who fakes a shark attack to get Sandro's attention) or ditsy friend Giulia (Dominique Blanchar) they're self-aware enough to know something better exists. In one scene, Sandro enviously spoils an artist's easel, musing about wasting his youth and ambition on petty affairs. Claudia ultimately wonders if Anna's disappearance wasn't a good thing. Considering how her and Sandro grow from the experience, that's not so selfish as it initially appears.

L'Avventura's reputation suggests something like Last Year at Marienbad or Death in Venice, where languorous visuals overwhelm a thin story. The movie's certainly slow-paced, but the intricately crafted story provides a good hook for open-minded audiences. Certainly the character dynamic proves compelling even after the mystery wanes: Claudia and Sandro are well-drawn protagonists, with convincing development from bored ciphers to flawed humans.

Monica Vitti makes Claudia sympathetic, showing anguish and discontent in a finely-crafted turn. Vitti would rejoin Antonioni on several later films, notably L'Ecclise and La Notte. Gabriele Ferzetti (Once Upon a Time in the West) does fine work playing a suave Lothario, forced to reconsider his lifestyle. In her brief appearance, Leah Massini suggests a heinous spoiled brat who must be the center of attention. 

L'Avventura isn't for everyone, but it's a marvelously crafted movie. You could do worse for your plunge into European art cinema. And the lack of tennis-playing mimes certainly helps.