Jingle All the Way

Let's get into the Christmas spirit by reviewing Groggy's family favorite Jingle All the Way (1996). It's a silly bit of holiday fluff that can't be considered a good movie as such, but it's loads of silly fun, with Arnold Schwarzenegger at his cheesiest mixed with some genuinely funny jokes.

Howard Langston (Arnold Schwarzenegger) is a workaholic dad who is always letting down his son Jamie (Jake Lloyd) and wife Liz (Rita Wilson). To make up for it, he tries to track down a Turbo Man toy for Jamie, oblivious to the doll's Furby-esque popularity. On the arduous road to find a doll, Howard fights off hordes of shoppers, including the psychotic mailman Myron (Sinbad), deals with a bumbling cop (Robert Conrad) and a crooked Santa (James Belushi). Meanwhile, Howard's sleazy neighbor Ted (Phil Hartman) puts the moves on Liz, much to everyone's consternation. It leads to a denouement at the Christmas parade where Howard is able to show Jamie how much he really loves him - and show him there are more important things than presents.

Jingle All the Way would be a guilty pleasure if I believed in such an idiotic concept; if I enjoy a movie I'm going to unashamedly like it, dammit. It's a ridiculous movie with a lot of silly humor and cartoonishness that shouldn't be funny, but it's damned entertaining regardless. The film has a good amount of satire of consumerism; Howard's desperate plight to join the mindless craze of the month is certainly relatable to any parent who's bought a Smurf, Furby, Pokemon or Tickle Me Elmo for their kid. There's a lot of slapstick and silliness of mixed quality, and some predictably mawkish sentiment, but it holds together as a silly bit of entertainment regardless.

Arnold Schwarzenegger isn't believable for a moment as an all-American Everydad, but he pulls it off with wonderfully self-deprecating humor and comic timing, much better than the unfunny Kindergarten Cop, which seemed like a typical Arnie film masquerading as children's fare. Sinbad provides most of the film's laughs with his amusing incoherent, stream-of-consciousness rants. Rita Wilson, Phil Hartman and Robert Conrad have rather thankless supporting roles, as Jake Lloyd is just as obnoxious as he'd infamously be in Star Wars: Episode I. James Belushi and Martin Mull handle themselves much better in brief cameos.

What more can be said? For cheesy holiday cheer, Jingle All the Way is hard to beat. It's no A Christmas Story or It's a Wonderful Life, but it is pleasant in its own slight, silly way.