Thursday, December 22, 2011

How much more better off would we be without.......?

 .......er....um....Bishops?


 
All church doors to be unlocked!


Well what a question. Who could ever think of such a thing?  Oh deary, deary me, quickly pass the sv!

But it’s a good one! Heh, heh.

Let’s break down the answer, point by point…..

We would not have…um….

 1. A Magic Circle – what? No cosy clique of men who can sit
     around of an evening chuckling at the Pope’s latest efforts to 
     draw the church closer to the teachings of Jesus Christ?
                                            
  2. We would not have the appallingly facile website dedicated to
      showing what a valuable job their Lordship’s are doing  
         http://www.catholic-ew.org.uk

 3.We would not have parishes closing down and Indian Masses
   being celebrated willy nilly. (Because there are simple steps one
   can take to reverse this decline)

 4. And no more Masses dedicated to homosexuals (or bank
     robbers, benefits cheats and shoplifters)

OK, OK, but let’s be a little positive here!

What are the benefits of being Episcopally challenged?

Answer - We would be able to start the brick by brick reclaiming and restoration process as follows:-

 
1. All churches to be left open during daytime hours

    2. Priestly discipline would be enforced (no more shell 
       suits, sorry Padre)

    3. The reopening of adoption agencies that reflect
       Catholic beliefs could take place

   4.Liturgical integrity could be ensured (strictly dancing
      on the sanctuary would be strictly prohibited)

   5. The Catechism could be taught in Catholic schools
       once more

   6. School admission policies to be reviewed and amended
       based on enrolling children from practising Catholic
       families

   7. A real evangelisation programme could be created and
       introduced

   8. Female altar servers could be refocused on a
       confraternity basis

   9. Traditional orders would be admitted freely to all the
       Dioceses

  10.The Ordinariate would get their churches (and a warm 
         rather than a tepid welcome)

  11. No more copies of The Tablet at the back of church

  12. ………………………over to you!

So what would be the backlash of such a move?

A question that Archbishop Mennini might ask -
I have it on good authority that he reads this blog every night (when he has difficulty sleeping).

Well. We would miss out by losing Bishop Mark Davies (chizzle)

And…….several golf clubs would collapse through a drop in membership fees!




Hey presto! No more Magic Circle!


Please note:
By pure coincidence Philothea on Phire has an excellent  post on Bishops today.

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