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What is pornography exactly?

Twerking, Victorian style

At one time, pornography referred to top shelf magazines in run down back street shops.

Fairly rapidly it progressed to allegedly responsible retailers such as WH Smiths and Menzies and it was not just magazines but videos and DVDs.

If you had to place a marker in time for when the fulcrum shifted and porn moved into the mainstream, it would be reasonable to cite the trial over DH Lawrence's now infamous book, Lady Chatterley's Lover, in 1960.

This opened the floodgates to an industry that knows no depths or parameters.

Today, television has run fast to gain a substantial place in the Porn Sweepstakes and those who do not know the name, Mary Whitehouse, should Google her and see for themselves the massive task this woman undertook and how much we miss someone of her calibre today.

And so, the public perceptions of what constitutes pornography have changed and we accept, today, what would have scandalised us twenty five years ago.

I have never watched the BBC TV "Strictly Come Dancing" programme, I have no interest in dancing and certainly not in the sort of dancing that "Strictly" employs.

Here, it must be said to those few who might now be saying: "How does he know about it if he hasn't watched it?" - that I have seen snippets, the sort of ten second glimpses that arise as you grope for the television remote control in order to turn off what has just invaded your living room.

And, yes, yes, yes, I hear all those good arguments that state that we should just get rid of our televisions.

Trouble is, as I age, by the time evening comes, I have diminished energy for reading or constructing models of St Peter's Basilica out of matchsticks.

I enjoy good television programmes and why not?

But, with the advent of "Strictly" we now have immodestly dressed dancers performing indecent dances.

 Twerk was a word Yorkshiremen used to describe where they went to from Monday to Friday.
Now it has been hijacked by the dancers who like to 'twerk', that is, dance in a lascivious manner.

And grannies in Biggleswade and spinsters in Exeter think it not wrong one jot that such gyrations should take place well before the 9pm 'watershed' and parents seem delighted to have school plays and events based on the "Strictly" theme.

That is the world we now live in.

Some years ago Mrs L and I were invited to the parish banquet (I think some good souls thought that we could be enticed back from the brink of orthodoxy).

During the course of the evening, the PP visited each table for a chat and, when it came to our turn he started off by recounting some recent films he had viewed.

He proudly announced that he had just watched 'The Full Monty' (this I believe to have been a provocative move as he knew full well we would not approve).

In true Pavlovian fashion I responded, in a calm and not outraged manner, that I did not think it was the sort of film a Catholic should watch, let alone a priest.

"Ah, it's just a bit of fun" said he.

And there's the rub.

It's all just a bit of fun, nudge, nudge.

And, if you think it's immodest or immoral or pornographic, then you are a killjoy, a puritan, a wet blanket, a party pooper - or, a traditional Catholic.

Mary Whitehouse was able to take on the media corporations and, if not exactly win, she certainly stemmed the tide and provided a platform for those who agreed with her views.

Do we have anyone of her mettle among us today?.....a leading Catholic  woman?.......a priest or, even, a Bishop?

None from where I'm sitting.

And if you would like to know what happened to the Parish Priest, a few years later he was arrested for importuning outside public lavatories, and fled to Ireland a few days later, never to be seen again.

Nosferatu The Vampyre (1979)

Werner Herzog's Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979) has a considerable reputation, with some critics deeming it better than F.W. Murnau's original. Yet this viewer found it underwhelming. Despite creative imagery and a pitch perfect Klaus Kinski, Herzog's movie largely feels like a pale imitation. Only in later passages does Nosferatu take flight.

Herzog adheres to Murnau's story while restoring Bram Stoker's character names. Jonathan Harker (Bruno Ganz) goes to Transylvania to sell land to Count Dracula (Klaus Kinski). Dracula returns to Harker's hometown of Wismar, where he takes up residence while spreading disease. Harker returns but seems traumatized (or worse) by his encounter with Dracula. That leaves Harker's wife Lucy (Isabelle Adjani) to confront the vampire.

Nosferatu starts slowly. Herzog recreates the original iconic line by line, often shot-for-shot: the trip through the Carpathians, Harker's tense dinner with Dracula, Lucy sleepwalking, Dracula's shipboard rampage. To be sure, Herzog's artistry is unmatched: Jorge Schmidt-Reitwein provides languorous photography, complemented by Popol Vuh's classics-inflected score. Yet it seems more tasteful homage than original movie. When a remake adheres so closely to the original it can't help feeling superfluous.

Fortunately, Nosferatu gradually gains momentum. Once Dracula arrives in Wismar, Herzog grafts his own vision to the material. He expands on Murnau's rat motif, with hundreds of teaming creatures decimating the town. Herzog stages surreal scenes as Wismar descends into funerals and anarchy, a pagan saturnalia presided over by rodents. In one darkly humorous passage, a surviving official demands Van Helsing's arrest - even though there's no town council to pass laws or no police to inform them!

Herzog stakes his ground by subverting pieces of Dracula lore. Professor Van Helsing (Walter Landengast) is a skeptical busybody who poo-poohs Lucy's warnings. Renfield (Roland Topor) mainly annoys Dracula, who sends him on a ghoul's errand to Latvia. More striking is the fate of our nominal protagonist: Harker grows weaker and weaker, Dracula apparently casting an amnesia spell on him to get in with Lucy. But Lucy won't be had, becoming the heroine by default. It leads to a low key but disquieting finale.

Klaus Kinski owns the film. Besides his striking makeup job, Kinski gives an usually muted, sensitive performance. He mixes Max Schreck's ratlike wraith with the tragic angst of most Draculas: he laments his inability to age, die or be loved, an ugly monster with an incurable curse. It's an interesting fusion that serves Nosferatu well, allowing Kinski one of his most unique performances.

Kinski's costars, unfortunately, don't measure up. Bruno Ganz, an actor rarely lacking in passion, is understated to the point of dullness. Even Harker's end revelation adds little. Isabelle Adjani does well in a role mainly requiring beauty and bafflement. Walter Landengast and Roland Topor prove awkward comic relief; Herzog doesn't know quite how to handle their alternate characterizations.

Despite some striking moments, Nosferatu the Vampyre isn't the sum of its parts. Those seeking a different take on this familiar story might enjoy it.

Poll Results In

Results now coming in...A whopping 96% of readers who voted considered there was something 'not quite right' about the German Bishops Conference owning an erotic porno book company.

To that 3% who voted that they should own 100% of the company, well done you got the answer right. Only by owning the company outright can you turn it into a religious publishing company that sells paperback books about the lives of the Saints. This was of course the Bishops' orgynial plan. Sorry. Original plan. It didn't work out that way, but hey, at least no scandal was caused, like by Bishops who buy expensive bath tubs and the like. Now that was a scandal.

MCs of distinction - what's in a name?

The servers from St Darryl's

Picture: Men are Like Wine Blog

As used to be the custom in Wales, many tradespeople and solicitors and the like were known, in a rather droll manner, by giving them a nick-name, a soubriquet, if you will.

So, Mr Jones the Butcher might be called "Jones the Steak" or the milkman, "Evans the gold top".

It was and possibly still is a rather inoffensive and amusing custom.

Eons ago when we first moved to Wales our local GP was a Dr David *****.

This poor man had built up rather a reputation for, how can I put this kindly?.....

....losing his patients. In fact, after his ministrations, many of them just keeled over and died.

Hence he was known as "Dai the Death" (and, for my reader from Baluchistan, let me explain that "Dai" is the diminutive for the name "David" in Welsh).

In a sense, this has applied to altar servers I have known over the ages - even in England.

At my parish of St Michael's & St Martin's, in Hounslow back in the 50s we had a couple of MCs who had extra names attached.

One, in particular moved about the sanctuary at something approaching the speed of sound and, when cornering, did not slow down but merely adopted an angle of 30 degrees.
For this he was dubbed (in accord with the times) Eddie "Spitfire" Molloy.

His colleague, who was balding and had an exaggeratedly saintly appearance on the sanctuary (hands together as per norm but head on one side and a far away look in his eyes), was dubbed "St Anthony" because, indeed, the statue of the saint at the back of the Church could, at a quick glance, be mistaken for the MC who shall be nameless.

In the 1990s I came across another MC who carried the soubriquet of "Scud".
This was based on the fact that you never knew where he would land or how much damage he would do.

It would be amusing, thinks I, if we collated other nicknames of servers through the ages, or, maybe, even make up one or two for MCs you are acquainted with.

A few that I have noticed in the London area might be worthy of attention.

You know, the ones that look as if they drink a pint of embalming fluid every night before bed.

Who are they? I could not possibly say. Christian charity does not allow.

Catholics, Poverty, Clericalism and the Family

One thing that gets me just recently.

Pope Francis's emphasis on poverty is fine. It not only strikes a popular chord but does teach us dependence on God's providence. But, something nags me about it. If you want to live a Catholic family life and be 'open to life', you need money to have a large family. It's a bit like when the Holy Father keeps talking about 'clericalism'.

Fine, whatever it is, it sounds like its a great problem, but in reality the vast majority of the Church consists of lay people who will never be clerics. What is the great crisis, other than the crisis of faith in the West? It is the great crisis in the family. It is this that is under great attack and many, the children of divorced and separated parents now need faith like thunder in order to have happy marriages and family lives - especially in this age when 'everything goes' (to bits).

On both matters the Pope is avoiding things that go to the heart of the crisis in the West, which is a crisis of Priests and Bishops, yes, but also of lack of fidelity and love for Christ's teachings and being generous and open to life. In fact, as a general trend, the West will commit suicide since it cannot replace its own population with 1.3 children per family - a family that is more often than not, unable to stay together for long.

Perhaps this is condemned by the Pope with regard to the culture of materialism and consumerism, but it still stands that Catholic families do need the necessary evil of money in order to be open to life and be generous to our generous God by being open to life. That isn't to put a price on a baby's head, its just an ever present consideration and often source of anxiety faced by every parent or prospective parent unless you are loaded. When the Pope speaks of 'clericalism', Lord forgive me but I just turn off because it sounds like His Holiness is 'talking Church' - priests talking about priests and how to be good priests - there is nothing more tedious to a layman's ears! - rather than talking 'Catholicism' or the Teachings of Jesus and His Church which save in their beautiful fullness.

We should welcome new life as readily as the Holy Father does!

'Poverty', 'clericalism', 'poverty', 'clericalism'. Fine, these are worthy points of discussion and teaching, but please, Holy Father, teach the fullness of the Faith, the Truth that sets us free, since while all are called to be 'poor in spirit' and some are called to poverty, chastity and obedience, and consumerism and materialism are indeed dangers to a sound and firm faith, without the Catholic family - that is families open to God's plan - the Church will die for lack of members and you may as well turn St Peter's into a mosque now. If only, Holy Father, every Catholic husband and wife welcomed babies as readily as do you in St Peter's Square!

The Lord told us how hard it is for the rich to enter Heaven, but He did not tell everyone to sell all they own and to give the money to the poor. He said that to the rich young man who asked to follow Him perfectly in order to attain eternal life. If a Catholic family gave everything they had to the poor week in, week out, or expended all their energies 'on the peripheries' they'd have little to nothing in terms of energy, love, education, catechesis and general necessities to give their children and the children they hope to have in co-operation with the Lord who is the Author of Life.

Blessed in marriage: Louis and Zelie Martin.

Of course, if a rich man has no intention of having children and he and his wife have no intention of co-operating with God in being open to life or being generous with their wealth to the Lord, then yes, surely, it will be very difficult indeed for that man and that rich woman to enter the Kingdom of Heaven since that man and that woman prefers the self-centred pleasures of this world to the generosity we should show to a generous, loving God that is among the true hallmarks of a Christian, whether s/he serves the Lord in a community, as a priest, nun, a single person or as a husband, wife, Bishop or Pope.

There is a great danger in the Pope simplifying the message of the Lord on poverty and wealth that makes a specific aspect of a particular apostolate general to the Church as a whole, when in fact, it surely stands that not every Catholic man and woman will be or can be Blessed Teresa of Calcutta or St Francis of Assisi. In fact, there is a danger of Francis making poverty and the Lord's teaching into an 'ideology'. We are indeed a 'broad and diverse' Church. We need Catholics like the parents of St Therese of Lisieux as well as holy monks, nuns, and friars. Below is a timeline of the heroic and saintly lives of Louis and Zelie Martin and, I think you'll agree that today, the timeline seems nothing short of revolutionary. I believe they may have had a little bit of time for the poor as well as a lifelong marriage, sanctity in their state of life and the fruitful Catholic education and parenting of nine children.

1823 August 22: Louis born in Bordeaux France.
1831 December 23: Marie Azelia Guerin born near Alencon France.
1850 November: Louis set up his watchmaker/jeweller shop in Alencon.
1853 Zelie set up as maker of Point d’Alencon lace in that town.
1858 July 13: Louis and Zelie married.
1859 September 9: Death of Zelie’s mother.
1860 February 22: Birth of Marie: first child of Louis and Zelie.
1861 September7: Birth of Pauline: second child.
1863 June 3: Birth of Leonie: third child.
1864 October 13: Birth of Helene: fourth child. Signs of Zelie’s future illness appear.
1865 Death of father of Louis.
1866 September 20: Birth of Joseph Louis: fifth child and first son.
1866 December Zelie’s ageing father came to live in the Martin household.
1867 February 14: Death of baby Joseph Louis.
1867 December 19: Birth of Jean Baptiste: sixth child.
1868 August 24: Death of baby Jean Baptiste.
1868 September 3: Death of Zelie’s father.
1869 April 28: Birth of Celine: seventh child.
1870 February 22: Death of Helene at five and a half years of age.
1870 August 18: Birth of Marie Melanie Therese: eighth child.
1870 October 10: Death of baby Marie Melanie Therese.
1871 Death of Zelie’s nephew Paul Guerin. Louis and Zelie billet nine German soldiers.
1873 January 2: Birth of Marie Francoise Therese: ninth child - future Saint Therese.
1877 February 24: Death of Sr Marie Dosithee sister and confidante of Zelie.
1877 August 28: Death of Zelie Martin from breast cancer.
1894 July 29: Death of Louis Martin after several years of suffering from an illness in the Bon Saveur psychiatric hospital in Caen. He returned home to die.

2008 October 19: Beatification of Louis and Zelie Martin.

If I had nine children to feed I'd require some pretty 'worldly' work in order to feed them. The world and life of the Catholic layman is going to be rather different to that of the Priest, Bishop and Pope. Surely, the message of the Gospel on poverty has to be presented in a different way to different Catholics in different states of life. Sin is sin, greed is greed, avarice is avarice, but the message on poverty must surely be tailored to different people with different needs, it cannot be 'one size fits all'.

Hearing Voices in Mill View Hospital

Mill View Hospital, Hove

The Eye of a Needle

Pray for a friend of mine who has been sectioned.

I've known this individual since about 2003. He is a baptised Catholic, despite being unable to drag himself away from the Book of Mormon and retains a stubborn refusal to worship on Sundays.

It turns out he has been there for about five weeks. Like I say, I've known him quite some time and I've often thought he needs proper 'care'. I don't know whether that is something given at Mill View Hospital. The staff seemed relatively indifferent to the patients all in all.

I went to visit him with a friend whose other friend was sectioned two weeks ago. It can't be pleasant being sectioned. When you walk into a mental hospital you imagine that through the opening of the doors, you'll be confronted by something out of a zombie film, or at best 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest' but it really isn't that way. They all seem 'normal' people - whatever that is in the modern world. They're normal and of sound enough mind to say things like...

"It's terrible here. The staff don't care."

I am suspicious, but not 'paranoid' about mental health hospitals. A little research on the net always reveals how many British Eugenics Society members went into mental health, obviously for 'rewarding careers' - if you enjoy sterilising and lobotomising the mentally ill. For example, I was told by another patient that my friend was 'in a really bad way' when he came to the hospital, but as long as I have known him he's been having conversations with Jim Morrison and the 'angel kingdom', hitting his own head in frustration at the voices he hears and developing a 'communicative relationship with my spit'. He is on a 'Section 3' which means he could be there until Christmas, perhaps beyond.

Brighton's most vulnerable are on an accommodation merry-go-round

Despite the severity of his schizophrenia, my friend is perfectly able to hold a 'normal' conversation. He can't look after himself, hears voices, takes drugs and doesn't come to Mass, but that really is nearly all of Brighton covered, isn't it?

He tells me how depressed he is, how even to have a cigarette, he has to go to the reception in the ward and ask a nurse to go outside with him to the garden to smoke. He's pale and withdrawn. He talks of his powerlessness in this situation:

"If I had committed a crime, or been sentenced to prison I would understand. Prison would be better than this, because at least then I would know what I have done wrong. Here, I have no freedom, my freedom has been taken from me. I don't understand."

So often, it seems, those in the State are unable to communicate effectively with those in 'their care'. There seems to be a lack of what Pope Francis calls 'dialogue' or a 'culture of encounter'. The staff are 'trained professionals'. It all seems like a job involving 'observation' and 'assessment' of the patients but as in hospitals the 'bedside manner' seems to be lacking.

West Pier: Less 'project' and more 'dumping ground'

Of course, I'll happily concede that my friend really does need proper 'care and support' with his condition - even a measure of 'supervision' - but the place is so depressing for him. All he has in his room is a blanket or two.

To add insult to the injury my friend feels (since whatever your condition and the treatment it requires it can never feel right or just to be held against your will in a mental hospital) he has been told that he will lose his flat before he is released and that he will be rehoused at 'West Pier Project', a 'temporary emergency accommodation' hostel in Hove, which is - helpfully for him - full of people with mental health problems, smack and crack addiction and alcohol issues. Nice, eh?  I believe this may well be accommodation owned by Baron Homes Corporation Ltd - Brighton's 'biggest property company'.

He's very confused and depressed. I'm sure he'll have a lovely time in the 'hostel' where tenants are known for injecting 'bath salts during deadly poke parties'. That was an article by an unscrupulous journalist, by the way.

Pray that you never fall into such dependence on the State that you are at its total mercy since mercy isn't really its abiding quality. On whether he 'deserved' or 'needed' sectioning I'm content to defer to the judgment of trained professionals and experts, but whether my friend should become another victim of Brighton's absurd homeless hostels merry-go-round is another matter. More on that to come in the next few days. It is a little scary to think how much power the State has over the individual in this country and a sobering thought that as society becomes more and more secular, the religious will be considered more different or 'insane' as time goes by.

"No pinky, don't do it!"..."Shut it, Rose!"

Meanwhile, I would really ask the question whether this art student could do with some time in a mental hospital himself - not because he is homosexual, but because he wants to lose his 'virginity' in front of a hundred strong art studio audience and then undergo a 'question and answer' session ("So how was that for you?") from the audience immediately afterwards. Welcome to the new age of 'normal'. It sounds like he needs help, but instead he gets headlines.

Oh and the revellers at Halloween, especially the 'zombies' - they're 'normal' too, aren't they? God help us all. Atheists would be surprised, but I'd say the practise of the Catholic religion is one of the few things that keeps myself and a few others in this city on a relatively 'even keel'.

Dracula (1931)

Universal's '30s monster movies are the rare works that overwhelm both source material and subsequent variations. Dracula and Frankenstein originate from classic novels, yet our image of them comes from Hollywood. And no matter how radically recent incarnations diverge from it (Twilight, True Blood, etc.), the stock vampire remains Bela Lugosi, slicked hair and clipped accent, admiring the "children of the night," swishing his cape and leaning hungrily over a sleeping Frances Dade...

Many modern viewers find Dracula (1931) stiff and dated. Certainly, after 80 years of parody and imitation, it can't but have lost some of its original power. That it's based more on Hamilton Deane and John L. Balderston's play than Bram Stoker's novel accounts for many of the flaws. But there's still plenty to enjoy: Tod Browning's atmospheric direction, striking photography and Bela Lugosi in the role of a lifetime.

English realtor Renfield (Dwight Frye) travels to Transylvania, hoping to interest reclusive Count Dracula (Bela Lugosi) in London's Carfax Abbey. Renfield falls under Dracula's spell and escorts the count back to England. Dracula, bewitching Lucy Wisterna (Frances Dade) before turning his attentions on Mina (Helen Chandler), fiance of John Harker (David Manners). Only Professor Abraham Van Helsing (Edward Van Sloan) guesses Dracula's true identity as a vampire. 

Driven by budget more than dramatic considerations, Browning and writer Garrett Fort severely compress Stoker's story. They elide Harker's adventures in Transylvania, pare down the cast significantly and leaves several plot threads dangling. Censorship undoubtedly took its toll: Dracula's wives are reduced to walk-on parts, and much of the finale occurs off-screen. Worse, a transmogrified Lucy's seen terrorizing young children, yet she and her victims go unmentioned afterwards! Classic or not, Dracula's storytelling feels awfully sloppy.

It's also true, as detractors claim, that Browning's direction often feels static, matching Fort's talky script. But Dracula's far from boring. Photographer Karl Freund makes beautiful play of light and shadow, the Transylvanian moors and London's back alleys equally eerie. Dracula's castle presages even more impressive works in James Whale's Frankenstein films, a decaying monolith draped in cobwebs (though armadillos seem out of place). The foreboding atmosphere compensates for any plot shortcomings or lack of fancy camerawork.

Unlike Nosferatu, which made its ratlike Orlock an elemental evil, Browning makes Dracula an overtly sexual menace. Lugosi acts like a bloodsucking Don Juan, irresistible to women, foreign and exotic, a charming corrupter spreading a personal plague. He blends into society without being part of it, mixing insatiable blood lust with angst at his immortality. Let's face it: the brooding hunks of Interview With a Vampire and Twilight are but an extreme extension of Lugosi's characterization. No longer a feral monster, Dracula becomes urbane, sexy, fearsome but almost tragic.

Bela Lugosi earned cinematic mortality, with a role he never matched (or lived down). He'd assayed Dracula on stage, using his commanding presence and Hungarian-accented voice to great effect. Browning plays both aspects to the hilt, adding mesmerizing close-ups to the mix. From his clipped diction to his mesmerizing eyes, Lugosi commands the screen, charming and repulsive in equal measure. Lugosi did relatively few worthwhile films after Dracula, succumbing to drug addiction and winding up in Ed Wood movies. A sad waste of an actor who, in this role at least, proved himself an all-time great. 

Dwight Frye gets flak for his rambunctious performance, but it fits the role perfectly. Renfield is a raving madman after all, not a character given to subtlety. Less effective are Edward Van Sloane, a bland Van Helsing, and Frances Dade and Helen Chandler's nondescript females. Joan Standard and Charles K. Gerrard provide effective comic relief.

Dracula may disappoint viewers expecting a faultless masterpiece. How can possibly live up to its reputation? That movie remains entertaining is praise enough.

RIP Hal Needham and Marcia Wallace

A few days late with this... stuntman-turned-director Hal Needham passed away Friday at age 82. After serving in the Korean War as a paratrooper, Needham became one of Hollywood's premiere stuntmen. A close friend of Burt Reynolds, Needham graduated to directing with Smokey and the Bandit, also penning its screenplay. That movie's success led to a prolific, if not especially distinguished career: Hooper, The Cannonball Run, Stroker Ace.

Few of Needham's films are good, and some absolutely terrible. But he'll always get a pass for Smokey and the Bandit, a big part of my childhood, and a not-quite-guilty pleasure even today.

We also lost Marcia Wallace to breast cancer at age 70. Well-known for The Bob Newhart Show and a regular on game shows like Hollywood Squares, for my generation she'll always be the bitter, sarcastic yet strangely likeable Mrs. Krabappel from The Simpsons.

Rest in peace to both.

Pray for Him and His Heartbroken Family to the Saint of Lost Causes

Sussex Police said the search for missing 14-year-old Dylan Alkins is continuing today. Dylan was swept away into the sea after playing near the waves with friends in Newhaven on Sunday afternoon.

Police, coastguard and RNLI crews were scambled at about 4.15pm yesterday after the incident at West Beach, Nehwaven.

After a six hour search, crews were stood down at about 10.30pm last night with the plan to resume this morning. A spokesman for the Marine and Coastguard Agency said the search has been stopped pending new information.

However the Newhaven in-shore lifeboat is carrying out a further search of the shoreline and a police helicopter has been checking the shoreline for several miles each side of Newhaven. Local police officers have also been searching along the beach and helping reassure the local community.

Chief Inspector Katy Woolford of Sussex Police said: "All agencies are continuing to do everything possible to find the boy, and our thoughts are very much with the family at this time." Friends of Dylan, who is believed to be a pupil at Tideway School in Southdown Road in Newhaven, have set up tribute pages on Facebook for friends, family and strangers to leave comments.

One user on the social networking site, who claims to be a friend of Dylan's, has posted a picture of a young boy standing inches from rough waves. Coastguards said they would not restart the search for Dylan unless they received new information from police.

Is this the image of Our Queen?

In recent years, forensic science has excelled itself in modelling faces from skulls so that we know just how stone age man appeared facially and, often, how sightings of criminal faces can be portrayed through e-fit pictures such as in the Madeleine McCann case.

The trouble is, we have to take the word of the forensic science men and women who make these sculptural or pictorial representations that they are accurate.

A Facebook report on Church Militant's entry features a depiction of Our Lady, taken from the image of Christ from The Shroud of Turin.

Of course, it is obvious when one thinks about it; the Son must resemble the Mother and the Mother the Son.

I cannot find any further information on the background to this report but here is the image, a stunning image, I think you will agree.

And I find it quite plausible that this is a reasonable representation of Our Lady.

What can you see in this face?
 Purity, Love, fear, apprehension, unparalleled goodness?

Of course, wherever Our Lady has appeared in the world she has been seen as being Japanese in Akita and as a Pyrenean girl, short and stocky in the manner of St Bernadette, in Lourdes.

It is also reported that St Bernadette tried to take the Church to task over the images that were created in the aftermath of Our Lady appearing at Lourdes as she knew that the tall, willowy figure could never have graced the grotto which is less than five feet in height.

But, I find this depiction absolutely breathtaking and, whether it is an accurate portrayal or no, it is surely a great portrait of Mary, the Mother of our God.

Nosferatu: A Symphony of Horror

The granddaddy of all vampire movies, Nosferatu (1922) holds a special place in cinema history. Todd Browning's Dracula (1931) established the standard screen vampire with Bela Lugosi's sinister, sexy count. But F.W. Murnau's work holds up better through its uniqueness: almost a century later, few vampires evoke the same dread.

The story follows Bram Stoker's Dracula, with names and locations altered. Realtor Knock (Alexander Granach) sends Thomas Hutter (Gustav von Wangenheim) to Transylvania, offering property to mysterious Count Orlock (Max Schreck). After a frightening journey through the Carpathian Mountains, Hutter meets Orlock. Back in Germany, Hutter's wife Ellen (Greta Schroeder) starts sleepwalking, dreaming of meeting the Count. Orlock brings plague and death with him upon arrival in Germany. Hutter enlists Ellen in a desperate scheme to eradicate the vampire.

Nosferatu came at German Expressionism's height, in-tune with baroque dream pieces like The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari. Murnau faultlessly mixes mood and technical invention. Different color schemes provide character themes: yellow (usually) for the Hutters, green for Orlock, red for the countryside. Murnau adds more surreal touches: under-cranked scenes of Orlock loading coffins; a photographic negative for Hutter's entry into Transylvania; Ellen envisioning a beach strewn with headstones. Murnau made other worthy films like Sunrise and Tabu but none quite match his artistry here.

One sequence guarantees Nosferatu immortality: Orlock's shipboard passage to Germany. Most Dracula films elide this scene; Murnau makes it Nosferatu's key set piece. Murnau builds the scene with crew members falling ill, tormented by feverish visions of the vampire. A crew member busts open the coffins, finding dozens of rats. The climax with Orlock bolting rigidly upright still has the power to scare viewers 90 years later. Murnau intercuts the scene with Hutter traveling overland, adding urgency and menace.

Murnau eschews the romanticism which not only Stoker but J.W. Polidori's The Vampyre instilled in vampirism. With ratlike claws and rodent teeth, Orlock is neither seducer or tragic antihero but an unstoppable, elemental Evil. Murnau sublimates Stoker's sexual symbolism for disease and decay. Orlock arrives with an army of rats in tow, spreading plague. His victims don't even receive immortality, just death. Many see Nosferatu as metaphor for Weimar Germany, presumably with Knock as a Spartacist inciting Bolshevik-vampire subversion. But a surface read is unnerving enough.

Max Schreck dominates any discussion of Nosferatu. No, he wasn't really undead as Shadow of the Vampire posits, but was by all accounts a strange and eccentric actor. Schreck's other films have faded into obscurity, while Count Orlock remains iconic. Terrifying makeup aside, Schreck shows silent film acting at its best. His cadaverous features play into a primarily visual, with habitual awkwardness and brusque, animal mannerisms.

Other actors are perhaps more interesting for back stories than performances. Greta Schroeder makes a radiant love interest. She remained active through the Nazi era (including a role in the infamous Kolberg), her last film coming in 1953. Gustav von Wangenheim, a Communist, fled to the USSR and played a minor role in Stalin's show trials. Alexander Granach stands out as the gnome-like, gleefully repulsive Knock. Granach became a venerable Hollywood character actor with roles in Ninotchka, Hangmen Also Die! and For Whom the Bell Tolls.

Even if not conventionally scary, Nosferatu still commands respect. Few other vampire movies are as unsettling, with an antagonist not tragic or human but monstrously evil. This approach, along with Murnau's strong direction, makes Nosferatu an enduring classic.

The Music Industry and Catholics

Who go on to corrupt the morals of Catholic girls and others.

BBC: Don't Destroy Democracy with Your Whacko Ideas!

'Don't think. It could destroy everything!'

That was a message today by a propaganda arm of the British State, paid for by you, in order to keep you docile, manageable and always credulous of what the State tells you.

There are many threats to democracy (is that really what we have?) but I do not consider conspiracy theories to be among them.

Catholics: Unplug your Televisions!

And anyway, the BBC protects padeos!

In Honour of Lou Reed, RIP

May his soul rest in peace.

Incredibly, its still better than anything Paul Inwood ever wrote. 

My personal favourite was Pale Blue Eyes...

Also better than anything written by Paul Inwood.

May the blue eyes of the Blessed Virgin Mary look upon the soul of Lou Reed with pity and compassion and intercede for him so that he may enter into eternal rest.

May perpetual light shine upon him, O Lord, and may his soul and the souls of the Faithful departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace.

Evangelising Through Weather

"Dear David Cameron, this is payback for 'same-sex marriage'..."

The Daily Mirror has a little piece on the Apostle and Martyr, St Jude Thaddeus, who has had the storm set to hit the UK in the early hours of tomorrow morning.

It is heartening that the meteorological experts still have enough respect for Christianity to name potential natural disasters after Saints. Good that Heaven can still evangelise through weather in these secular times.

We are due to be struck by gusts of up to 90 mph, so say a prayer for me and all us here in the UK and especially for St Mary Magdalen Church's roof in particular. Pray too for any homeless who could be in the storm tonight that they may find shelter and protection.

St Jude, patron saint of lost causes, protect us this night and tomorrow from storm, flood, fire, wind and all calamities produced through nature. Protect our Churches, friends, families, loved ones, relatives, benefactors and enemies.

Humanae Vitae: The Unpopular Revolution

This evening, I watched a mammoth 2-hour interview with Alan Watt, a researcher into geopolitical affairs.

I find it very interesting that there are some figures (who are not courted by the mainstream media) who after research have deduced that the nations of the West and other nations too have been well and truly duped by the 'powers that be' with regard to the issues of abortion, sterilisation and artificial contraception.

Watt maintains that through the UN, which has ambitions of  'global governance' (that's slang for World Government) whole nations may yet be persuaded to sterilise, contracept and abort, even euthanise themselves to 'save the planet'.

His research into the works and writings of such people as Huxley, Darwin and a host of Royal Society fellows has led him to the conclusion that the sexual revolution, with its attending music and drug revolutions in the 20th century were well orchestrated affairs that came from the very top down. Seemingly not a Catholic, there does seem to be a wake-up call in the alternative media (though not in the mainstream media) that there is much that the West has accepted that has only been accepted through propaganda tools that border on hypnosis through the mainstream media. Same-sex marriage has been a pretty good illustration of this, but even those who disagree with it are presumably so disenfranchised and disempowered by the orthodoxy of 'political correctness' that they fear speaking out or making their voice heard on it.

This doesn't yet seem to be something that concerns Russell Brand too much, who has been calling for revolution on Newsnight, but even Brand's often amusing observations on the media, power and society are signs of an awakening within sectors of society that the World so often offers us illusions, myths and lies concerning moral behaviour and our acceptance of generalised, accepted 'norms'.

Russell Brand's ravings aside (a more interesting interview can be seen here),  I wonder how it is that non-Catholics like Alan Watt can so eloquently put the case to the evils associated with abortion, sterilisation and artificial contraception and document their origins and source in eugenic thinkers of the ages who continue to govern as a self-preserving elite, yet the Catholic Church in England and Wales (and even in Rome) can be so quiet on the subject.

I must say I find it offensive that the Lord Jesus Christ should be mentioned by Brand in the same breath as Che Guevara, Ghandi and Malcolm X and Martin Luther King, but I guess at the time being that is just where Brand is 'at'. It seems to me that his main point is that an elite governs over the vast majority. He seems to want "revolution" without knowing how to replace the existing order (like so many anarchists). Paxman nails him on just that in their interview because Brand can only say what a society would not be after 'the revolution'. So said every false prophet since the Lord Jesus! Still, thankfully he is just a comedian. The Catholic revolution, in its effects upon the world, would bring many things, none of them disastrous. It would, for instance, bring many, many lovely babies into the World!

Alan Watt: Say no to the enslavement of abortion, artificial contraception

While it is disheartening that atheism breeds in this country so much emnity towards the Catholic Church, it is heartening at least that even atheists and agnostics are beginning to wake up to the idea that the information fed to us through the mass media from an early age is indoctrination of the worst sort, creating not servants of God or even servants of humanity, but slaves, economic commodities of world's powerful elites that prefer to remain hidden from view while creating an order that is designed only to further their economic interests and that of their inter-breeding dynastic families.

G.K. Chesterton was fully alive to the threat posed by the eugenic thinkers and the self-preserving powerful elites of his day, penning a work entitled Eugenics and Other Evils. Why are non-Catholics taking up on the grave threat posed to humanity by both freemasonry and eugenics, but the Catholic Church remains largely silent in the face of not only a holocaust of the unborn, but to a system of beliefs that, unchallenged, poses such a terrible fate to bodies and souls in the 21st century?

To me, that is a mystery. I don't think Russell Brand and the Catholic Church are on the same page on sexuality, marriage and the transmission of human life, but as long as he keeps an open mind and challenges the propaganda spouted by the mass media about general matters, there is at least a chance that they one day will be.

The revolution espoused by the Catholic Church is never going to be popular. It is not a call to arms, but a call to self-sacrifice and the worship and service of Almighty God. It is the unpopular revolution if its the only one that makes any logical sense. Fight the power! Have loads of babies! Worship God! Its exactly what 'they' don't want you to do! Rebel!

A great many people who talk about the 'New World Order' are right, in my opinion, on many of the things they say. The real rejection of the new world order is, in many ways, summarised by Pope Francis's recent teachings - that marriage between a man and a woman is beautiful (the only kind of marriage recognised by the Church) and that no human life should be sacrificed on the altar of consumerism and materialism, because these are just what the passing and illusory joys that become the enslaving values of a world that honours money and power above family, love and the transmission of that most precious of gifts - human life itself - children.

I see we have another comedian around who reads my blog. He voted 100% in the poll in my sidebar. Thank you, you made me laugh!  Of course, if only the Catholic Church owned the pornographic book industry, we could change it and make it holy and Catholic from the inside! Let's infiltrate it! Now we see the genius and cunning of the Bishops Conference of Germany!

The excesses of Halloween....

....increase each year.

Friday's Daily Telegraph carried a report that the multi national stores and major employers are censoring (good word that) all Halloween costumery that might cause offence.

We all know what that means. No more wild eyed arab masks, no more "gay" outfits and no more butch gear for the....you know who types.

Standard Halloween costume....
.....who cares about offending Catholics?

But, believe me, that censorship will not include any mad monk outfits or saucy nun habits.

Commercial censorship is only concerned with giving offence to Muslims, Homosexuals and Lesbians (and the in-betweeners).

I know of one parish where the priest has made valiant efforts to encourage parents to revive Halloween as a Catholic event where the children dress up as their favourite saints.

No interest from the parish.

Not ghoulish enough, not zombie enough, too "holy" and we mustn't have that!

But, if you do wish to hold a Halloween party, and why not? you can do it with a Catholic (and original) theme.

Here is how one commentator and friend (Mommymayhem) and her family celebrate All Saints' Eve......

Thank you GM.

Lace and Tradition

Little Prince George. A traddie in the making?

Not a renaissance prince, though!

Ten things the Devil doesn't want us to believe

Picture: Shameless Popery

It's easy to think of the things that Satan wishes us to believe about the state of Holy Mother Church (see HERE).

But, we often forget (and he does not remind us) of the things he wants us to airbrush out of our memories.

Spiritual amnesia is one of his most potent weapons and we need to guard against it.

Here are ten of the things that, I believe, he wants us to disregard and discard.....


1. That Our Lady is the Mother of Christ and has her heel on the head of the serpent.

2. The Ten Commandments - how often do you hear those quoted today?

3. The chastity of St Joseph, foster father to the Christ child

4. That our priests are 'Other Christs', born to a lifetime of sacrifice

5. We are still the one, true Church - and always will be

6. Fatima demands our attention and our prayers and penances

7. At Mass, bread and wine are changed into the actual Body and Blood of Christ

8. That the doctrines of HMC are set in stone and cannot be replaced by a false conscience

9. Sanctity of life

10. Power of the Rosary

Phenomena

There's a consensus among Dario Argento fans that his talent's dropped off precipitately. Since Opera (1987) his movies have grown increasingly poor, style smothered under rampant absurdity. His most recent effort, Dracula 3D (2012), reached its nadir when the title vampire morphed into a giant mantis. Not to mention Argento's fetish for showing daughter Asia naked, beaten and raped. 

Phenomenon (1985) represents an early dent in Argento's skill. An odd supernatural thriller, it's full of gratuitous gore and weird ideas that never gel. Jennifer Connelly keeps the show from being a complete disaster, but the movie delivers few frights and little pleasure.

Jennifer Corvino (Jennifer Connelly), daughter of an American film star, arrives at the Richard Wagner Academy for Girls in Switzerland. She alienates her schoolmates when she's revealed to have a primal connection with insects. Her only friend is John McGregor (Donald Pleasance), an etymologist helping police track a gruesome serial killer. When girls at the school start falling prey to the murderer, Jennifer uses her newfound powers to track them down.

Of all the potential Phenomena shows, it's the main idea that disappoints. Jennifer's insect connection provides one arresting set piece, when she silences mocking school girls with a swarm of "friends." Yet Argento makes surprisingly little of it. The bugs help Jennifer uncover a murder clue and once save her life, yet otherwise feel tacked on. Jennifer makes a key discovery following swarm of maggots, surely something a non-"gifted" protagonist would spot equally well. It's a bad sign when the movie's central conceit feels superfluous.

The whole film's equally messy. Argento was never strong on plot, yet his films generally make sense - even the demented dream logic of Suspiria and Inferno. Phenomena chucks so many ideas at the screen that none really stick. Is it a murder mystery? A supernatural thriller, Carrie-style? Gothic horror? A movie can be all those things, but Argento doesn't tie them together. Bits of story hang there without amounting to much: characters leave without fanfare, people die gruesomely, plot strands vanish unceremoniously.

When Argento does try to make sense of anything, he fails spectacularly. Periodically the action stops cold for lifeless exposition and cringeworthy dialogue. Characters overreact to mundane developments in comical ways. Jennifer sleepwalks one night, so she's accused of schizophrenia! How does that work? Even better is a scene where Jennifer takes shelter at Frau Bruckner's (Daria Nicolodi) home, where (after friendly introductions) Jennifer instantly turns nasty and Bruckner spontaneously starts insulting her guest. Is it sublimated tension rising to the surface? More likely, it's bad writing and atrocious acting.

Even stylistically Phenomena is a letdown. Argento's baroque touches, so effective elsewhere, seem labored and ludicrous. The killings become parodic, with characters barging into abandoned houses to be carved up. One scene, with Jennifer trapped in a pool of decaying corpses, is surely as disgusting as any set piece ever filmed. The problem is it's too gross to be genuinely scary. Not to mention the killer's reveal, or McGregor's chimp with a razor fetish. Goblin's score incorporates tracks from Motorhead and Iron Maiden to little effect.

Jennifer Connelly makes Phenomena watchable. With a badly written character, she nonetheless exude scharm and charisma, propelling her to instant stardom. The other stars register little. Donald Pleasance flounders in an empty part, complete with pathetic Scottish accent. Daria Nicolodi froths and devours scenery as a mad villainess. Patrick Bauchau and Michele Soavi putter about, even more useless than most giallo policemen. The schoolgirls are interchangeable harpies.

Phenomena is a major disappointment. Far from a stylish chiller, it's a stilted collection of oddities without aim or direction.

Dr Ian Paisley to form a new club

Breaking news!.......

In a revealing press interview, Dr Ian Paisley, Head of the Presbyterian Church in Northern Ireland, has announced that he is to form a new group comprising both Protestants and Catholics and he's calling it, wait for it.....

.........The Tyburn Club!

Founder members of The Tyburn Club marching to Marble Arch

What a great title.

Membership will be open to both Catholics and Protestants and is free if you are a member of the Orange Order, or if you happen to wear a bowler hat, white gloves and carry an umbrella.

The agenda for the new club is, according to Dr P, fairly straightforward.

It will meet on the third Friday of each month on a traffic island in Central London and will commence with a series of talks on fascinating subjects such as, "The myth of the Catholic Martyrs" and "Hanging was too good for them".

A special club anthem, entitled, "1535 - what a year" has been commissioned from the famous composer Saul Outwood with lyrics by Stephen Fry, a well known and much appreciated Catholic hater.

This post has drifted horribly close to another, far superior blog so, I shall call a halt here.

It is enough to state that those who head the Catholic Church in E & W seem intent on leading us down the road signposted 'Perdition'.


Picture: Wikimedia

Pray

What can we do but pray for them?

Massive Storm Headed Our Way, Dedicated to Saint Jude

St Jude...not to be confused with Michael Fish.

After this weather report, Britain was hit by its biggest storm of the 20th century.

Seriously, though, this could be a big old storm. 

Perhaps we should pray to him to ask his intercession that its devastation be mitigated by his prayers.

St Jude, that is.

Not Michael Fish.

More must be less enthusiastic

"The 1535 Society? Not one I would like to join"

The reports of the Archbishop of Westminster (Catholic), the Bishop of London (Protestant) meeting in the cell of St Thomas More within the Tower of London to mark the founding of a group called "The 1535 Society" (you couldn't make it up), must have caused the martyrs of England and Wales some amusement.

Stephanie Mann has two posts on the event HERE.

Now St Thomas More was a man who did not mince words. He was, after all, a lawyer as well as a wit and a man of letters.

He must have been looking down on the gathering of Bishops in his cell with a wry smile on his lips and, possibly, a puzzled frown.

"Why, oh why" he must surely be saying, "Are those who put me to death now recognising me as a martyr for the one true Faith and forming a society that has a most awful date connotation?"

Leaving the presumed thoughts of St Thomas on one side, I left a comment on the Supremacy & Survival blog, adding what I thought would be a scrap of modern history to the St Thomas More cell story.

I recollected that, many years ago, a Catholic group had met in More's cell every Friday night where a Mass was celebrated and that, when HM the Queen got to hear about it she panned it tout suite!

A certain Captain Alan Parsons commented that my account was untrue - humph!

That sent me scuttling to my press cuttings file only to discover, shock, horror, that the Captain was correct and that I was wrong (this must be a first!).

The fact of the matter is that a journalist, by the name of Julian Large (ring any bells?)...should do, he is now an Oratorian Father and Provost of the London Oratory, had written a report about a secret Mass being celebrated in the Tower of London.

But, it was not a Mass celebrated in memory of St Thomas More but St John Fisher!

Silly me, getting those two muddled up.

The full story was written up in 1994 in the Daily Telegraph and the Queen intervened only when the Mass was moved from the martyr's cell to the chapel of St Peter ad Vincula within the precincts of the Tower.

So I was partially right and partially wrong (is that possible?) and I owe Captain Alan Parsons an apology (grit teeth).

But the main thrust of the story is really the fact that Holy Mass was celebrated in the Tower of London from 1991 to 1994 when the Queen bashed it on the head.

The instigator of these Masses was a Peter Bearcroft, described as a retired railway executive (that means anything from CEO to a guard these days).

The force in the Tower at the time was Major General Tyler (what a lot of military titles flashing about today) who was, I believe, a Catholic.

I did post on the Queen's apparent anti Catholicism in the matter a couple of years ago, you may read it on the link below:
http://linenonthehedgerow.blogspot.co.uk/2011/08/is-queen-anti-catholic.html

So, Captain Alan Parsons, I unreservedly apologise for mixing up St Thomas More and St John Fisher, but there were Masses held in the Tower of London which, I think was at the heart of your comment.

Yours

Lance Corporal Richard Collins 

A bad odour and a traditional Catholic

My last post concerned a prominent female blogger who appears to view traditional Catholics rather less favourably than something nasty found on the sole of her shoe.

This is not an uncommon reaction but, many years ago it was only one's work colleagues (non Catholics) who would curl their lips and wrinkle their noses when it came out that you were Catholic.

I believe that this was a show of both distaste  and fear born out of a form of grudging respect that they held for those of the Catholic Faith.

They knew that our Faith was black and white, no shades of grey, no prevaricating, something was either right or wrong (and then the whole world believed that homosexual acts were wrong).

Today it appears as if it matters not to the world if we are Catholic or Newt worshippers - we are worthless and to be ignored.

And now it is fellow Catholics who make silly faces when they learn that you are at the traditional end of the swimming pool, (the deep end).

Earlier this year I was making a return journey from up North (sorry, oop North) when I had to change trains at Stockport.

Who should be sitting in the platform waiting room, resplendent in his habit, but a Dominican Friar.

There is no sight more wonderful on our streets than a Dominican in full fig.

White stockings, black, highly polished shoes and a black and white habit with a set of large Rosary
beads interwoven into the hem of the garment.

As a child of the Order I felt compelled to sit alongside this epitome of the Faith and strike up a conversation with him.
We spoke of my Dominican school (St James' Burnt Oak) and of current affairs with regard to HMC.

And then I blew it. Our pleasant chat came to an abrupt halt when I asked the question:
" Do you celebrate Mass in the Extraordinary Form Father?"

His face betrayed him as if he had just taken a mouthful of dead rat.

"No, never" he spluttered, coming up for air.

And that, sadly, was the end of that. He made some feeble excuse such as having to catch a train and departed pdq.

He is, how shall I put it? One of the most senior Dominicans in the country and his name (which I shall not divulge) is very similar to a highly notorious brother Dominican with extreme left wing tendencies.

And therein lies the clue to his response.
If he had been a young OP he would have not made the silly face but, as a member of the old guard he had already made one somersault back in 1969 and he was not going to chuck away his "Spirit of Vatican II" shroud to make another about turn in 2013.
Fr Z's words, which have been taken out of context and twisted to make them appear uncharitable, ring true here.
I paraphrase:
The biological clock is running out on the old guard and, when they finally shuffle off, the Catholic world will be left with a stronger orthodox base.

Trouble is, many of us will have shuffled off by then also.

I am far from a paragon of virtue but, if I learn that someone only attends the OF Mass or, indeed, shows a dislike of the EF one, I do not pull a face.

And I wish our allegedly liberal friends would not do so either.
 

Spot the 'Luxury Bishop'

In one of these buildings has been recently living a 'Luxury Bishop'. Whoever gets the answer right wins a night in a lavish hotel in Rome. I know a lot of money has been spent on the residence of a Prince of the Church. But what happened to, 'Who am I to judge?' 

Exactly how much does it cost to maintain Vatican residences? What happened to 'mercy' and 'not casting the first stone'? Why don't German Bishops 'tell tales' on their brother Bishops to the Holy Father when one of their brother Bishops is spouting heretical nonsense, fostering dissent and rebellion against Church doctrine or when they are covering up some heinous clerical crimes?

And, honestly, what's going on with the media's treatment of this Pope? This was 'big news' on Sky News when I just walked through the station. Has Sky recently been taken over by Gloria.TV or something?

Why can the Holy Father be so swift and decisive in suspending a Bishop in Germany for the sin of spending too much money on residences which he must know will house his successors after him, but a more 'politically difficult' or 'unpopular' decision is put on hold indefinitely? Is morality in 'the court' of Francis only about money and its prudent spending?

I am sad to ask the questions, but why are unpopular statements left to such as Archbishop Mueller, but popular decisions like this taken by Pope Francis to the joy of the media, so that others look nasty and mean, but the Supreme Pontiff always ends up looking great? 

It all seems very Latin American to me, but I didn't think the papacy was a political position but a spiritual one - involving spiritual fatherhood to not just the laity, but priests and even Bishops. Moreover, I always thought Jesus taught us that it was a joyful and holy thing, to be hated by the World for the sake of Jesus and His Gospel and that if the World spoke well of us, something is seriously wrong.

Holy Father? Don't you want to share in the humiliations and sufferings of those who proclaim the truth for love of Jesus?

Say a prayer for a man who just walked into Rome a Prince and walked out of Rome a leper. Oh...and while we're on the subject: Whatever did happen to that 'explosive dossier' on the 'gay lobby' in the Vatican? Has it, like Francesca Chaouqui's saucy Twitter feed, suddenly disappeared?

I always thought 'worldliness' wasn't just about the disordered quest for money and possessions, but also about the disordered quest for sex and power as well. 

Our Lady of Fatima: Miraculous Statues

A statue of the Virgin Mary and the Infant Jesus is set at a makeshift altar before a pile of stones that was the 180-year-old Our Lady of Light Church in Loon, Bohol province, a day after a 7.2-magnitude quake destroyed the church.

Two statues of the Blessed Virgin Mary stand—without any blemish—amid the ruins of two churches in Maribojoc and Loon towns following Tuesday’s devastating earthquake. It was enough for residents to raise their hopes that life will get better. “It was a miracle,” Carol Ann Balansag said after residents of Barangay (village) Poblacion were surprised to find the 18th-century statue standing askew but without any scratch on the rubble of what used to be the Santa Cruz Parish Church.

The same feeling of amazement was felt by at least 600 people staying in makeshift tents on the church grounds of the Our Lady of Light Parish Church in Barangay Napu in Loon town. They were teary-eyed when they saw the grotto of the Birhen sa Kasilag (Our Lady of Light). “The earthquake destroyed the church, but it spared our patron,” said Fr. Tom Balatayo, one of the residents.

Meanwhile...

On the day after His Holiness Pope Francis consecrated the world to the Immaculate Heart of Mary, while commemorating the Miracle of the Sun at Fatima, hopefully contemplating the yet unfulfilled request of Mary to consecrate, with all the world's bishops, Russia to her Immaculate Heart, and to release the Third Secret, lest God punishes the world with a great chastisement, a miracle occurred in the Philippines.

A large earthquake hit the southern Philippines. It's epicenter was the island of Bohol. It also occurred in the nearby island of Cebu. The death count is 160+, and 250+ injured. The people noticed a pattern. The main buildings to collapse were the old churches. In several of these churches the only thing that remained standing was a statue of Mary.

Yet, the most profound sign came from the most visited Marian Shrine in the Philippines on the island of Cebu, called Mama Mary shrine. There is a large, miraculous statue of Mary in this shrine, that has cried and cured many pilgrims. In the same church there is another statue of Mary, that appears to be Our Lady of Fatima. It has a base with the word "Portugal" on it. This base is continuous with the statue. They are one piece. The base cannot be detached from the body. Otherwise the statue would be broken into two pieces.

Here is the great miracle, which seems to be a message, a warning from Our Lady of Fatima. Right after the earthquake, pilgrims noticed and cried out in alarm that this statue had changed. Mary was now facing the wall, with her back to the people. But, the base itself, molded to the body of the statue, was still facing forward with the "Portugal" inscription!

Our Lady of Fatima, pray for us!  May Pope Francis and the world's bishops do as Our Lady requested.

Down with "ists"

Are you an "ist?"

Do you know of any?

Perhaps your next door neighbour is an "ist" or, maybe, your Parish Priest is one.

According to one famous blogger, the Dame Edna of the blogging world, "ists" are everywhere and they should be thrown onto a bonfire or racked for a day or two to teach 'em a lesson (no, the Dame did not actually use those words but she is most displeased with "ists" and I have no doubt that she would like to impose some form of modern day punishment upon them).

A good beating about the head with a rolled up copy of the Tablet or a home baked giant cupcake rammed down the throat is more her preferred style of punishment, but back to the "ists".

They are, of course those Catholics who might harbour pious thoughts regarding Fatima and the (whisper it softly) Third Secret.

Some like to speculate that there's more to the Third Secret than meets the eye.

A notorious 'Fatimist'

If you believe that then you're a "Fatimist" and should purge yourself by reading one of the Dame's religious tracts whilst gulping down a gallon of chilli castor oil.
Or, if you seriously wish to punish yourself, just read the tract.

Next on the list of "ists" is the "Latinist".

Sit iucundus tibi dies - infantem!

This has a slightly unwholesome ring to it and conjures up visions of some sinister swivel eyed loon who mutters Latin phrases to himself whereas, as we all know, those who favour Latin as per the EF Mass, are all sensible, attractive types with no vices whatsoever.

Finally, we come to the worst "ist" of the lot. The Lefebvrist or Traditionalist (the Dame and her chums often seem to lump the two together, and why not? They are both "ists").

Traditionalists are really not Catholic at all; they form a sub human level of society somewhere between devil worshippers and heretics (if she only knew).

Dame Edna hates anything with an "ist" attached to it

The illustrious Dame speaks of Traditionalists as if she is describing something nasty found on the sole of her shoe after a walk in the park.

Which leaves me wondering....what does she believe in?

Where does she stand with regard to the Faith?

Yes, yes, I know the answer to that one, it's a well used old saw to say "But I'm just a Catholic" as if that, in today's world, answers everything.

Well, you can dance naked round a pentagram and call yourself a Catholic or you can attend Masses where the celebrant wears sweater and jeans and call yourself one.

We are no longer one, holy, Catholic Church, we are a spectrum of disparate colours and I would much rather be described as an "ist" than as a charismatic.

She has not mentioned 'Modernists', however.

I wonder why?