Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Well Dodgy!



I was just filling the old family truckster up with some petrol the other day and my eyes fell upon this strange construction, innocuously placed in the forecourt of a BP petrol station in Ditchling Road, Brighton. A shifty looking man (I decided he looked shifty once I put my fantasy heroic investigative journalist hat on) took out one parcel and replaced it with another.

The service is a 'parcel exchange'. 'Hmm...', I thought to myself, 'So, the days of men meeting men in dark glasses, hats and long trenchcoats and chucking each other brown paper envelopes stuffed with cash in car parks are over then!' Oh, woe! Why must more advanced electronic key-based technology put paid to years of car park-based, seedy, council, police, drugs-trade related shenanigans in this fair city? We all revelled in that Hollywood image of corporate and state-based corruption and now it has all being ruined!

It is plausible that the entire Brighton drugs trade is going through this 'parcel exchange' system as it looks so innocent when you are telling the young man in the forecourt to 'fill her up' that nobody would suspect. I might get a deck chair in the Summer and just spend all day photographing the people who exchange their parcels there and see how they react. Of course, there is CCTV there at BP, but would even BP suspect such dodgy deals could be going on?! I can feel a conspiracy theory coming on! Anyhow, they're not called Business Direct Ltd anymore. They're called DX Business Direct. They specialise in 'Time Critical Logistics'. Time critical logistics?

"Hi...Yeah, where shall I leave the smack?"
"Why not just put it in that parcel exchange place at the BP garage?"
"Yeah, sure. Why not, eh? Will you leave the cash in there for me?"
"Yeah, cracking. Nice doing business with you."

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