The Dawkins Song
O my name is Richard Dawkins
And I just can't stop talkin'
Another day,
Another pay cheque for an interview
On the God Who's not existin'
'Cos in my heart I just dismissed Him
So if you believe there must be something
Deeply wrong with you
O my name is Richard Dawkins
I'll never put a cork in it
I say absurd things every day
Then pass them off as truth
Like, 'If you're not getting laid, dear'
And if you're not getting paid dear sums
No influence? No power?
There must be something wrong with you!'
Oh its a hard life
Being me
With the message
That I preach
It's the 'survival of the fittest'
And I want to be the richest
Atheist in history!
Yes, my name is Richard Dawkins
The media,
They're all fawnin'
Over every hateful,
Anti-Catholic statement that I make
Whoah and every time it happens
It increases my bank balance
I'm onto quite a winner here
What are the odds its a mistake?
See without God
What's the point?
All my fame and riches
They disappoint!
Because when I die and meet my Maker
And I'm facin' my Creator
The Catholic Church?
I'll wish I'd joined!
Arrest the Pope, arrest his butler!
Arrest every Catholic nutter!
All Catholics are medieval, evil, twisted, effin' freaks!
Sky fairy myth believin' cretins!
While I tour the world jet settin'
Pushing propaganda for my loyal, Royal Society
Yes, my name is Richard Dawkins
I've been employed,
Yes, I've been brought in
To dismantle the traditional Judeo-Christian worldview
And to facilitate the dawning
Of the 'Brave New World' that's formin'
Human clonin',
Reproduction in a laboratory near you
But its a hard life
Sellin' your soul
For a project,
So heartless and cold!
That'll be why I'm so embittered
And why I rant all day on Twitter
I'm Richard Dawkins
How do you do?
If you're layin' in the gutter
Then you don't really matter
Richard Dawkins
Ain't that the truth?
That's my Malthusian message
Charles Galton Darwin's eugenics
I'm Richard Dawkins
I'm just a tool
For the people who rule you
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