Dick

With my fascination for all things Richard Nixon, I was intrigued by Dick (1999). One of innumerable '90s Boomer nostalgia flicks, it's basically Clueless meets Forrest Gump, with two ditzy teen girls playing a pivotal role in the Watergate scandal. It's a cute idea, but writer-director Andrew Fleming provides only the most obvious jokes in a tedious would-be comedy.

Betsy (Kirsten Dunst) and Arlene (Michelle Williams) are two precocious 15 year olds who inadvertently witness the Watergate break-in. During a school trip to the White House they recognize G. Gordon Liddy (Harry Shearer), and later see H.R. Haldeman (Dave Foley) shredding documents. To buy their silence, President Nixon (Dan Hedaya) employs the girls as dog walkers, leading to an improbable friendship. After hearing one of the Watergate tapes, in which Nixon swears and kicks his dog, the girls become Deep Throat to journalists Bob Woodward (Will Ferrell) and Carl Bernstein (Bruce McCullouch).

Dick certainly has potential. Fleming re-stages scenes from All the President's Men and Oliver Stone's Nixon almost verbatim, two self-important dramas ripe for lampooning. Instead of political satire, he mainly contrasts teen naivety with political backstabbing. Betsy's airhead proclamation that "war is bad for children" sparks a bitter debate over Vietnam, for instance. Arlene gets a crush on the President, building a bedroom shrine and fantasizing about a romantic getaway. Shredding the Constitution is no biggie, but mistreating Checkers is too far!

Sadly, Dick makes little use of its clever premise. The movie starts with a silly slapstick fight between Woodward and Bernstein and never transcends the sophomoric. Writers Fleming and Sheryl Longin cram the show with repetitive gags about pot cookies, porn movies and puns on the President's nickname. Long set pieces just sit there: the idea of a baked Leonid Brezhnev (Len Doncheff) singing "Hello Dolly" to Nixon and Kissinger sounds funnier than it actually plays. Not to mention a painful, pointless scene where Betsy flirts with a teen hunk (Ryan Reynolds) she thinks is Haldeman's son.

Kirsten Dunst and Michelle Williams salvage something through charisma. Williams steals the show with her brainy earnestness and unlikely affection towards Nixon. Dan Hedaya makes such a good Nixon we almost wish he played him in a drama. Fleming assembles and wastes a neat supporting cast. Will Ferrell and Bruce McCullouch just bicker obnoxiously; Dave Foley (Haldeman), Saul Rubinek (Henry Kissinger) and Jim Breuer (John Dean) merely offer lame impressions. Harry Shearer gets two hilarious scenes, then completely vanishes.

Dick is a good idea badly executed. It's harmless and silly, with an appealing cast that will win over some viewers. Too bad it's not very funny.