Saturday, April 25, 2009
Fat Tests for Hedgehogs
The Government, following new developments in public policy calling for 'fat tests' for the obese, has extended the policy to hedgehogs. The hedgehog on the right has a bad diet, smokes and doesn't do enough exercise. He has been told by his GP to 'sort it out' and go on a hedgehog fitness training programme in Ipswich. All hedgehogs are to face the 'fat test' to see whether they are to be accepted equally among hedgehog society or made to feel rubbish and be sent to a State Fat Camp.
The National Hedgehog Liberty Group, 'Hogwatch', have released a statement concerning the new proposal:
'We, the National Hedgehog Liberty Group, 'Hogwatch', are appalled by the Government's new scheme, because Hedgehogs shouldn't be forced to get fit for the Government's sake, or change their diet. While obesity among hedgehogs is a problem, and a health issue, we think the Government's fat tests for hedgehogs are far too draconian and cruel.
I learned last night a new animal fact from a man in the pub who knows many animal facts...The only predator that can kill a tortoise is the eagle, by the method of picking it up and then dropping it from 100 ft in the air. Then it flys back down and picks the poor dead creature to death. Aren't eagles horrid!?
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